Run My Website Through The Ringer!

[Vacman]

Ok folks,

This is the moment you've all been waiting for! :)

My website is online and having a blast with it's new home on the internet!

I think it likes it much better than hanging out on my hard drive :)

Anyhow, I built it myself, and I'd like you to tell me your honest opinion.

Some of the links do not work (on purpose) and I have not incorporated the demo quite yet. But this will give you an idea of the general look/feel/sales copy.

The product is not available yet, but will be very shortly.

Here's what I'm hoping to hear back from you folks:

1.) Overall vibe/impression the site gives off.
2.) Do you understand the product? And if you have questions, please list them so I can incorporate the answers in the sales copy.
3.) Would you buy it? Or know anyone who would?
4.) Any suggestions?

Here it is:

*Link Deleted While Website is Updated*

Thanks for your help! I really appreciate all the support and insight this forum brings!

Remember constructive criticism is totally welcome and encouraged! Have at it! :)

[jc_]

First of all, congratulations on getting your site up!

Secondly, the review:
Ok, my honest feelings about the site is it seems like an awfully murky area in which to tread. To me, it sounds too good to be true, and my reaction would probably be 'if it seems too good to be true, it probably is'

Also, the idea of losing weight quickly and effortlessly sounds like 40% of the spam I get in my inbox (the other 60% being about pre-approved mortgages and enhancement drugs)

If the software is really different and effective, perhaps you should try to portray that more in your sales copy by not using tired, gimmicky-sounding phrases and buzz words ('secret', 'amazing', 'absolutely') and talk in plain terms about why your solution is different and better. Talk science, not sales, and people will pay more attention. Also, I'd think you'd want to approach people on their level instead of speaking like a county-fair salesman trying to pitch them another magical diet solution.

Concrete suggestions: I'd recommend going into more detail on what the software actually does, and how it helps people lose weight.

Also, your logo looks very nice, and the K-Cal package looks great--nice reflection.

Anyways, take everything I've said with a grain of salt, and let PPC testing etc help dictate what you do. You definitely follow Tim's rule that goes something like ' people may not like you but they should never misunderstand you'. :)

-Jen

[Mackay]

Good start. Let us know how it goes.

You cant both have a testimonial and be the owner. Unless you make that a center piece ala "I loved the shave so much I bought the company."

Get another friend to give you a testimonial.

[cartoonfan1983]

Good start. Let us know how it goes.

You cant both have a testimonial and be the owner. Unless you make that a center piece ala "I loved the shave so much I bought the company."

Get another friend to give you a testimonial.

I thought the same thing too. Your ad copy is verrrrry long too... any way to shorten it? It just sounds way too good to be true and I do not know how many people really would believe what they're reading. That's just me.

[lykrah]

Congrats on getting your site up! It's no small feat. Here are some comments:

My primary reaction was one of impatience with the site. I thought the copy was too long and I had a single, immediate question that I wanted answered -- how does this work? -- which wasn't answered until I got about 80% of the way down. If I were just normally surfing, I wouldn't spend more than 5 seconds looking for the answer and if I couldn't find it immediately, I'd surf on. Having said that, I think that's easy to fix since you can bring it higher up in your copy. Also, I'd want a lot more detail on exactly how this software works. For example, if I enter a McDonald's cheeseburger into the software, will it tell me that I can only eat .64 of one per day? Is it going to tell me that I can only eat 4 cherries? In other words, what output is it going to give me? Can you display a sample output to convince people that they're not going to get a diet they can't live with? Just keep in mind that if the program does give you something crazy like you can only eat .64 of a cheeseburger, people won't be able to implement it so you need to convince them that not only can they eat what they like but they can eat reasonable portions of it.

Good luck with this!

[Marcie]

Hi there - I really find your product interesting! I am sort of a novice nutritionist anyway :p The price tag would probably scare me off, honestly, but you can do some price testing. I am also not a giant fan of long ad copy but again, something you can test. If you want/need someone to test the software itself I'd be glad to help :) I understood the product pretty quickly, the one question that popped in my head was how would it work for a vegetarian/vegan or other restricted diet..but it looks like I enter in my own food so I assume that I'd be safe but I might want some reassurance on that subject. Maybe a good item for a FAQ.

Oh maybe consider something like "three easy payments of $29.99" or something...

Good Luck!

[final_id]

blah blah blah blah

I looked for thirty whole seconds. I couldn't find what I was looking for -- one direct, to-the-point statement of what the hell it is. This website screams "ad copy, ad copy, hype hype hype." It has a funky "fake scientific" name; pictures of people I've never seen or heard of before; no information and a lot of excited palaver, generally with exclamation points. I hated it.

Cut it to less than one screen. If the average window on the average browser on the average desktop has a scroll-bar on the right, IT'S TOO LONG.

Eliminate anything you WANT to say. Say only these five or six things:

How much it costs
Why I want it
What to do with it
Who else uses it
Why it works better than everything else
How much shipping will be
When can I get it

and most important

WHERE should I click to BUY it!????

[freetime]

Wow - you put a lot of work into the website!

Here's my thoughts:

1. Try and establish credibility by providing scientific facts/statements from reputable sources- find medical journals on nutrition & weight loss. Intersperse them throughout your ad copy so that there are 3-5 found on the page. Nothing long or elaborate, just that support your proposition.

2. Do not go for the hype sale, go for the scientific sale - rework your ad copy so that it reinforces the factual statements you use from #1 above. A paragraph to follow each statement

Throw a formula in there that show's an energy equation based upon food intake and energy expenditures. Graph it as well so it is visual. Perhaps you could take an average meal and then a K-cal meal to show the difference and then extrapolate out to show the kind of weight loss that's possible. Again graph the results.

Get some individuals with a nutrition degree to provide a testimonial for your product, stating how it will accelerate weight loss especially if combined with exercise.

Get testimonials from people who have benefited from the k-cal program stating how effective it is and esay to use - again 3-5 will do.

4. Lower your price, make it reasonable - Of course test price, but make it affordable while providing room for an affiliate program. You'll want to piggyback on others who sell to the same markeplace. Let them do the work for you.

5. Shorten your copy and focus on the science and the results that they will get speaking in specific terms, using actual numbers of pounds, clothes sizes, inches etc.

6. Your guarantee is impossible - too complicated - it screams you're afraid of returns.

Guarantee that yours is the best product of its kind available and that if they find a better one you'll gladly refund their money.

Guarantee that they'll see and feel a difference within 14 days and that they can get a full refund with no questions asked at anytime.

Why should you care? You've already spent the money to develop the software so there's no additional costs for reproduction or delivery that you'd have to expend - so you have nothing to lose. You don't want unhappy customers nor do you want to scare away potential purchasers with stringent terms no one can meet.

Give a real guarantee and you'll build huge confidence among the public.

7. Go out and find people selling to your market and partner with them.

I hope this helps!

[Vacman]

Thanks everyone for your honest and helpful replies!

I really appreciate the time and effort that went into the feedback. And I'll be incorporating a lot of your advice.

lykrah, for example, I agree that .64 serving size would be hard to deal with. And so this program makes sure that everything rounds to .25, and you can change that on the fly as well, so I'll incorporate more about this in the sales copy.

Vegan/All Organic/Vegetarian/etc. All of those would work, because Marcie, you're right, you can pick whatever foods you want, it works with anything that you have the nutritional information on, I'll incorporate that as well (actually that info was on my test page originally.)

freetime, the guarantee is a little long, but I have to be honest, I know that my product works, I just don't know if people would just buy it to get their money back if they saw a 200% money back guarantee. So I thought I'd only deal with people who are really willing to use the product, and if it really didn't work, then I'd gladly give them 2x their money back. Any suggestions about how to protect both myself and the customer at the same time?

final_id, Sorry this put a bad taste in your mouth :) I'm working on the organization. But I really appreciate your honesty, I need that type of feedback if you really feel that way.

Mackay and cartoonfan1983, I know the copy is long, but I think it needs to be based on my research. I may test long against short in the future just to be sure. And I know that using myself as a testimonial is kind of strange, but I honestly only have 2 real documented reviews that I can put up publically. I mean who is really willing to go on the internet in their underpants? :) I was hoping to build up more testimonals and put them up over time. I only want true testimonials on the site.

jc_, I'll work on incorporating more hard science in my sales copy as well (more on that below.) And thanks for the compliments on the grapics! :)

This seems to be a controversial website, as I thought it may be.

I do not want to appear as some "slimy" sales person just trying to make a buck. But I really believe in my product, and I think it can help a lot of people, and the only way for me to help them is if they actually buy my product.

So I'm really gearing up the website to sell the most copies possible, and create as many happy customers as possible. I think it's a fine line between selling a product, and instilling trust at the same time, as people are generally skeptical when being sold anything.

My original intuition was to create a shorter website, with less copy. Possibly more pages, and a more corporate look.

With all the research I've done, it appears as though long copy and scrolling pages, although some people have problems with them, still are the best received and sell the most on average.

While that may be true, I do think I need to work on the organization, and make it really easy for people to find the information they need.

I also agree, that on the surface this may sound "too good to be true" and I assure you it isn’t. I just somehow didn't make the connection that I'd probably need a little more proof to show that the statements on my website are the truth.

So I've gone out an compiled a great deal of research studies and news reports. I'll post those as well as more evidence.

Again, I really appreciate any and all suggestions you folks have, even the really negative ones. I need to know how this is perceived, and as my name, and face are on the site, my reputation is also at stake here. So I obviously want to keep this as respectful as possible, while still selling and helping people at the same time.

Thanks!

[final_id]

final_id, Sorry this put a bad taste in your mouth :) I'm working on the organization. But I really appreciate your honesty, I need that type of feedback if you really feel that way.

...

So I'm really gearing up the website to sell the most copies possible, and create as many happy customers as possible. I think it's a fine line between selling a product, and instilling trust at the same time, as people are generally skeptical when being sold anything.

...

My original intuition was to create a shorter website, with less copy. Possibly more pages, and a more corporate look.

...

With all the research I've done, it appears as though long copy and scrolling pages, although some people have problems with them, still are the best received and sell the most on average.


OK then. Whatever sells the most, is "right" by me. :)