Tim Ferriss Scam! Practical Tactics for Dealing with Haters 442 Comments
Brute force seldom works with haters. Redirection does. (Photo: Deadstar 2.0)
I recently spent a week in Amsterdam enjoying bicycles, canals, Queensday, and… ahem… coffee shops. For real. Honest. The best coffee I’ve had in Europe has to be De Koffie Salon.
I also gave a short keynote at The NextWeb about how to deal with haters, protect yourself from (some) media, respond to FlipCams, and other personal branding self-defense 101.
Think you have crazy people contacting you or commenting on your blog? Me too. I share some of my favorite hater e-mails, Amazon reviews, and voicemails. It’ll make you feel better to hear the stories.
It is possible to learn to love haters. But it does take some know-how and tactical planning…
I elaborated on a few points in an interview in the Netherlands with Amy-Mae Elliot, who originally posted them on Mashable in her piece Tim Ferriss: 7 Great Principles for Dealing with Haters:
1. It doesn’t matter how many people don’t get it. What matters is how many people do.
“It’s critical in social media, as in life, to have a clear objective and not to lose sight of that,” Ferriss says. He argues that if your objective is to do the greatest good for the greatest number of people or to change the world in some small way (be it through a product or service), you only need to pick your first 1,000 fans — and carefully. “As long as you’re accomplishing your objectives, that 1,000 will lead to a cascading effect,” Ferriss explains. “The 10 million that don’t get it don’t matter.”2. 10% of people will find a way to take anything personally. Expect it.
“People are least productive in reactive mode,” Ferriss states, before explaining that if you are expecting resistance and attackers, you can choose your response in advance, as opposed to reacting inappropriately. This, Ferriss says, will only multiply the problem. “Online, I see people committing ’social media suicide’ all the time by one of two ways. Firstly by responding to all criticism, meaning you’re never going to find time to complete important milestones of your own, and by responding to things that don’t warrant a response.” This, says Ferriss, lends more credibility by driving traffic.3. “Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity.” (Colin Powell)
“If you treat everyone the same and respond to everyone by apologizing or agreeing, you’re not going to be recognizing the best performers, and you’re not going to be improving the worst performers,” Ferriss says. “That guarantees you’ll get more behavior you don’t want and less you do.” That doesn’t mean never respond, Ferriss goes on to say, but be “tactical and strategic” when you do.4. “If you are really effective at what you do, 95% of the things said about you will be negative.” (Scott Boras)
“This principle goes hand-in-hand with number two,” Ferriss says. “I actually keep this quote in my wallet because it is a reminder that the best people in almost any field are almost always the people who get the most criticism.” The bigger your impact, explains Ferriss (whose book is a New York Times, WSJ and BusinessWeek bestseller), and the larger the ambition and scale of your project, the more negativity you’ll encounter. Ferriss jokes he has haters “in about 35 languages.”5. “If you want to improve, be content to be thought foolish and stupid.” (Epictetus)
“Another way to phrase this is through a more recent quote from Elbert Hubbard,” Ferriss says. “‘To avoid criticism, do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing.” Ferriss, who holds a Guinness World Record for the most consecutive tango spins, says he has learned to enjoy criticism over the years. Ferriss, using Roman philosophy to expand on his point, says: “Cato, who Seneca believed to be the perfect stoic, practiced this by wearing darker robes than was customary and by wearing no tunic. He expected to be ridiculed and he was, he did this to train himself to only be ashamed of those things that are truly worth being ashamed of. To do anything remotely interesting you need to train yourself to be effective at dealing with, responding to, even enjoying criticism… In fact, I would take the quote a step further and encourage people to actively pursue being thought foolish and stupid.”6. “Living well is the best revenge.” (George Herbert)
“The best way to counter-attack a hater is to make it blatantly obvious that their attack has had no impact on you,” Ferriss advises. “That, and [show] how much fun you’re having!” Ferriss goes on to say that the best revenge is letting haters continue to live with their own resentment and anger, which most of the time has nothing to do with you in particular. “If a vessel contains acid and you pour some on an object, it’s still the vessel that sustains the most damage,” Ferriss says. “Don’t get angry, don’t get even — focus on living well and that will eat at them more than anything you can do.”7. Keep calm and carry on.
The slogan “Keep Calm and Carry On” was originally produced by the British government during the Second World War as a propaganda message to comfort people in the face of Nazi invasion. Ferriss takes the message and applies it to today’s world. “Focus on impact, not approval. If you believe you can change the world, which I hope you do, do what you believe is right and expect resistance and expect attackers,” Ferriss concludes. “Keep calm and carry on!”
Afterword
One of my favorite authors, Nassim N. Taleb of Black Swan fame, e-mailed me the following aphorism today, which was perfect timing and perfectly put:
Robustness is when you care more about the few who like your work than the multitude who hates it (artists); fragility is when you care more about the few who hate your work than the multitude who loves it (politicians).
Choose to be robust.
Posted on May 18th, 2010
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442 Comments
Brendan Wenzel — May 18th, 2010, 2:02 pm
Great tips dude! Haters are just jealous of other people’s success because they will never have it. I’ve always admired people that are where I want to be because that’s the only way to get there. By hating on people that are where you want to be, you are telling the universe you don’t want that kind of success and you’ll never get it.
Chris Hughes — May 18th, 2010, 2:02 pm
Hey Tim, I had a discussion with my father about this earlier today. I had posted something on my facebook profile that he considered was “unprofessional” and I thought it was just pretty funny. I know that he has my best interest at heart, but he also has been successful living in the corporate life. He mentioned that people will not want to buy from me if they know that I thought something was funny that could be offensive in some way or another. Isn’t that what makes humor what it is though?
I know that there are going to be people who completely despise how open and honest I am about who I am, but there will also be the group who absolutely loves me for it. Should I focus on listening to his advice or keep being me and just dealing with those people who are understanding of it and are my true fans?
Thanks in advance!
Oneitis — April 12th, 2011, 11:21 am
You communicate with your father via facebook? How was your last christmas, did you send an e-card?
John Solter — May 18th, 2010, 2:05 pm
All true, and since we are quoting people here, my favorite saying about haters is from Katt Williams (to paraphrase): “What you need is more haters. If you don’t have at least 20 haters, then you can’t be doing that much.”
Both Thomas Aquinas and Napoleon Hill have said that they learned much about their failings from their enemies.
Brendan Wenzel — May 18th, 2010, 2:06 pm
There will always be haters in the world. Just know thy you’re not successful until you have at least one hater.
Hethir — May 18th, 2010, 2:09 pm
Brendan says it well. Thanks for this great video!
Alex Karasyov — May 18th, 2010, 2:11 pm
totally badass tattoo
Hethir — May 18th, 2010, 2:15 pm
I just realized you got a new tattoo! Cool, I have been thinking about going for it for years now, what moved you to get yours?
Chris Mower — May 18th, 2010, 2:18 pm
Just 10%??? Wow… sometimes it seems like a lot more. I’ve only watched the first 5 minutes of video, so I’ll have to watch it later tonight when I’ve got some more time.
It seems that a few months ago you wrote something on your blog to the effect that you can’t try to please everyone… As someone who enjoys making sure people feel comfortable and naturally avoids confrontation, I’m learning that confrontation isn’t bad as I try to do what I feel is best. There will always be people who confront you and think you suck–it just takes some getting used to is all.
Can’t wait to watch the rest of the video.
Cheers from Utah!
Evan — March 31st, 2011, 1:18 pm
Yeah, the 10% is something called the ‘vocal minority’. Happy people usually don’t have much to complain or whine about and the secure people usually don’t feel the need to degrade or attack someone else to make themselves feel better.
I always think of an animal documentary. Animals raise their hackles and growl at stuff that make them feel afraid or threatened.
Brandon Carter — May 18th, 2010, 2:28 pm
Thanks Tim. This is great advice. I have a popular youtube page and i used to go CRAZY when the “Trolls” would talk trash on my videos. i once spent a full day trading insults with a 14 year old kid!!! lol, now thanks to one of your earlier blog post, i just have my assistant delete negative post. thanks!
P.S. you book changed my life, i make my full income from the net now! I can not thank you enough
WC — May 18th, 2010, 2:29 pm
“In fact, I would take the quote a step further and encourage people to actively pursue being thought foolish and stupid.”
This is interesting. I was that kid that was bullied in school. Sometime after college, I realized I like me and started doing things specifically to stand out. I have a hot pink iPod, for example. All my friends say nothing about it because they know I don’t care what people think. Strangers look at it and shy away from me. It doesn’t -mean- anything and yet strangers act like it’s this huge problem for a big burly guy to have a pink iPod.
Since I’ve been doing things like that, I have gotten a lot better with criticism. Some of that is my mental change that allowed the behavior, but the behavior has been self-reinforcing as well.
Chris Mower — May 18th, 2010, 2:39 pm
Decided to watch the video right now anyway… couldn’t wait.
“Focus on people who value relationships over transactions.”
Excellent advice. People who value transactions are there to cause a stir, to do something just for the immediate attention–and more often than not it’s negative.
As part of your advice, I’d say, make sure you’re one of those types of people who value relationships as well. Be the type of person you want to attract.
Great video Tim, thanks.
Alex Karasyov — May 18th, 2010, 2:53 pm
HAHAHA!
Where did you get that tattoo?
@JoeHobot — May 18th, 2010, 2:59 pm
There is always going to be haters. Btw Tim I tried to contact you via Twitter from @JoeHobot account.
Anyway I got your book yesterday and I read (listened) 85% of it by today!!! Yeah i sleep only 4hrs per day.
So about those haters , don’t bother and don’t even bother your self with returning them a favor of explaining things…use them in positive way.
Sincerely,
Joe.
Alec — May 18th, 2010, 3:04 pm
screw you tim! that was the worst video i’ve ever seen
Julia Mozley — May 18th, 2010, 3:09 pm
All’s I know is I’m glad you’ve gone ahead and said it like you mean it, *especially* when you know it’s controversial. Good example for me.
Your panache and “extremeness” is exactly what made me sit up and pay attention to what you have to say.
Alex Murray — May 18th, 2010, 3:11 pm
Nice bit of pre-bedtime viewing for me (in the UK) thanks Tim!
Adam Bate — May 18th, 2010, 3:25 pm
Excellent speech!
It’s unfortunate that we have to put up with the haters in the first place.
Mark C. Webster — May 18th, 2010, 3:50 pm
Once read that the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. If some people love you and others hate, usually means you’re doing something right.
Great talk.
PS – Love the tattoo gimmick. Well-played.
Doug Armey — May 18th, 2010, 4:17 pm
Tim:
Great reminder. The only one getting shot at is the one sticking his head up above the crowd. Stay down in the crowd to not get criticized. But of course you will accomplish nothing more than follow the crowd.
The big question is whether to live life safely with mediocrity or live boldly with the opportunity to accomplish great things.
Having been in high profile positions before and received my share of criticism, I’ve said often our choice is not whether everyone will like us. They won’t. Our only choice is who will like us. Make sure it is the ones that matter to you most.
Thanks for the post
Mason — May 18th, 2010, 4:33 pm
Im right in the middle of “The Fountainhead” by Ayn Rand and I’m seeing a lot of parallels between the way Howard Roark deals with criticism and your suggestions here. I dont know what your views are on objectivism and individualism but, in any case, I like the operating system you’ve presented here.
Cameron Watt — May 18th, 2010, 4:50 pm
There’s an important difference between a cafe and a coffee shop.
Tim Ferriss — May 18th, 2010, 4:53 pm
Precisely why I used “coffee shop”
Nate Green — May 18th, 2010, 5:09 pm
At least now you know you can deadlift more than them, too.
soultravelers3 — May 18th, 2010, 5:09 pm
Great post! I loved the tips when I first saw them on Mashable & have tweeted them several times. Glad to see the vid!
“It doesn’t matter how many people don’t get it. What matters is how many people do.”
& “Living well is the best revenge.”
Say it in a nutshell for me!
Love this one too:
“I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear. ” ~Martin Luther King, Jr.
Maria Brilaki — May 18th, 2010, 5:15 pm
Queensday? Any picture of you on flickr in orange?
Bill Jones — May 18th, 2010, 5:17 pm
Very cool! Will have to share this info to a few others!
Henley — May 18th, 2010, 5:23 pm
Great advice, especially #3. It may boost your ego when a lot of people like you, but it’s very superficial. Most people deep down will stop caring about you if you stop being funny, or interesting, or rich or whatever.
David Turnbull — May 18th, 2010, 5:25 pm
Downloading the video now. I’m lucky that any haters so far haven’t said much more than homophobic slurs or attempt to spam blog comments…but oddly enough even these instances feel like sort of a badge of honor, as if to say “Oh, people are insulting me, I guess I am doing stuff the matters.”
(Granted, I do take care to distinguish between genuine, constructive criticism and flat out haters.)
Ricardo — May 18th, 2010, 5:31 pm
That fake tattoo trick is just great, and by the comments we can see that worked well..
Aiselade — May 18th, 2010, 5:40 pm
Hater’s are people who just don’t understand or are confused as to why other’s love and admire you! Great post Tim!
Dan Evans — May 18th, 2010, 5:47 pm
Love that you worked “Tim Ferriss Scam!” into the blog title. If you’ve already got the google juice, might as well use it to cover that base too.
Good points from great minds well articulated. Thanks.
Jason Dre — May 18th, 2010, 5:48 pm
You have “haters” because you mislead. You were national kickboxing champion by winning 3-4 fights as your buddy Josh wrote? Please.
Chris Tierney — May 18th, 2010, 6:05 pm
Nice talk! Love the sleeve, I picked up one in Hong Kong a few years ago. When are you coming to Singapore.
Brian Schick — May 18th, 2010, 6:26 pm
I find its all to easy to question yourself when haters attack. But as you said, it should bring you confidence that put yourself out there, plus the support of friends and family can remind you that you are in the right. Great tips Tim!
Chris — May 18th, 2010, 6:37 pm
Tim great speach… cool stage…..
Kat Williams said in one of his stand ups… ” That if you dont have five haters by summertime you need to get busy! Be thankful for your haters.
Donovan — May 18th, 2010, 6:38 pm
Timbo, where did you get your tattoo and was it your design?
Devon — May 18th, 2010, 6:49 pm
Great information. It was very insightful.
Philip Green — May 18th, 2010, 6:56 pm
Very informative as always! This will certainly come in handy with the approaching launch of my startup.
Artur Sapek — May 18th, 2010, 7:03 pm
Of all the people I’ve seen trying to pick apart trolls, you’ve done the best job. I especially liked the vessel with the acid metaphor… took a while for me to really get a grasp on it but you are absolutely right about resentment being the punishment. Nice stuff.
Chris Gaskill — May 18th, 2010, 7:07 pm
The story of Cato dressing differently and learning to be ashamed only about what matters resonates deeply with me due to recent experiences which you, Tim, could be considered the catalyst of in a way.
I have some problems with my left ankle and recently realized that I need some pretty big orthopedic inserts if I need to wear regular shoes to be without pain. It was not until I saw your post about Vibram Five Fingers that I thought about how I am pain-free when I walk around barefoot, and how I often removed my shoes and drove barefoot for my 4-hour drives 2 days a week to and from my house. So I gave them a try and my ankle pain cleared up in three days. Beyond that, I loved how they felt, a lot of pain in my lower back disappeared, and so I was an instant convert and stopped using normal shoes pretty much completely about a year ago.
I’m proudly from New Jersey, but moved to Houston about 7 years ago to be with my wife as she is from the area. I work on the road deep in East Texas in a small town of about 6,000 people. As one might imagine, boots or dress shoes are pretty much the only choices for most men in the area. I get lots of stares, some laughs, and some comments, intensified by the fact that I am naturally always very alert of my surroundings and am constantly monitoring everyone around me. My coworkers find them amusing and couldn’t consider doing it themselves, and even my wife giggles a little about how silly they look.
This had the profound effect of me becoming more open about who I am, more confident in myself, and overall a better person who is better able to withstand criticism. I’m kind of proud of them like the guy above with the pink iPod, and I’ve had more than a few people come up to me with serious inquiries about why I wear them and how they can get some. I enjoy being without pain (without meds no less) and comfortable. This extends to other areas of my life as well and overall has made me a better person, much in the same way for Cato.
So, thank you for the book, the advice on shoes, and this video. All three have been extremely useful for me.
Also, it’s a shame the 2nd commenter was kind of hating in his own way as saying what you presented wasn’t applicable to many people. It is a shame he couldn’t see how this can easily apply to life and dealing with people in general. It was a brilliantly presented topic.
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 12:05 am
Thanks so much for the comment. Great example of Cato’s principle, as is the pink iPod! Love both examples.
Funny how the second commenter was too focused on thinking up a zinger (which is wasn’t) vs. the broader message: these tools are for dealing with criticism in LIFE. No one needs a blog or hate mail to experience that.
Tim
Tony K — December 31st, 2010, 10:37 pm
I read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s Pulling Your Own Strings about being “quietly effective”. Don’t wrestle with negativity from the masses, but always think for yourself and act rebelliously if necessary. Wise words…
Andrew Alexander — January 21st, 2011, 3:29 am
this is was humbling and will be exactly what I need this morning to keep on the path Ive formulated. You and Tim both are truly inspiring.
Colin Aimes — May 18th, 2010, 7:13 pm
As somebody who’s experienced a lot of flack and observed the phenomenon of shit-talking extensively, people attack figures like Tim Ferriss because such figures pose a threat to their egos. To admit to themselves that they have been doing things that may very well be completely contrary to their goals, would be to admit that they have been wasting their lives. Rather than have a Red Pill/Blue Pill moment and become better people, they choose to defame and slander. It is a matter of close-mindedness and unwillingness to change. We shouldn’t try to change such people’s minds because they are likely unchangeable and will only dampen our moods. Besides, the less people embrace positive ideas such as those Tim Ferriss preaches, the better those of us who do embrace them will look.
Is it just me, or did that crowd seem dead?
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 12:03 am
It was a VERY quiet crowd all around. This has been my experience in Europe, and it’s really unnerving as a speaker. The Twitter chatter showed people enjoyed it, but it was near impossible to read them during the preso. Same deal with Japanese, who think it’s rude to make noise during the presentation, so it’s dead quiet. Quite a contrast from us rambunctious (and often rude, true) Americans
Tim
Evan — March 31st, 2011, 1:27 pm
Yes, I’ve always found cultural differences fascinating. It made me think of how David Hasselhoff is a superstar in Europe, but mostly considered a has-been in America. LOL You just never know!
Rachel — May 18th, 2010, 7:24 pm
I LOVE this post!
I was actually going to blog about something similar soon.
Steve Pavlina once mentioned how people’s immediate reaction to anything that seems out of their current lifestyle is to say it’s stupid/unreasonable/not worthwhile/not going to work.
He said that he even did it himself, after he found out about someone doing a 92 day juice cleanse. He thought, “Who in their right mind would do that?”
…and then found himself doing it a year down the line.
I think it’s people’s immediate defense mechanisms and their mind trying to avoid having to go out of its comfort zone.
I really love “focus on living well”, too. As an entrepreneur, some people have thought I was nuts along the years. One of my friends who got the same resistance asked me, “How can you prove that your life is better than anyone else’s?”
I don’t think anyone should TRY to prove it, and I don’t. However, I’ve always thought if someone tried to come head to head with me, there are definitely things that could be compared:
- Happiness levels
- Debt levels
- Amount of friends
- Amount of experiences
I haven’t found any “hater” who’s had too many success in those areas.
When I used to get a lot of resistance from my family for doing something “crazy” (sleeping in my car on random cross country trip, impromptu ticket to Brazil, etc…), a simple “Who’s happier – you or I?” tended to do the trick, too.
Selena — May 18th, 2010, 7:24 pm
Tim,
Great post! This is very helpful. I look forward to more haters in the future so I can implement these principles. I welcome the experience.
Mark Fidgett — May 18th, 2010, 7:39 pm
Nice article. Well timed considering this Social Media revolution
Allen — May 18th, 2010, 7:43 pm
I think you have to burn through a lot of people who don’t “get it,” or you’ll never make a significant impact in the few that do. As an example, brutal or radical honesty doesn’t make every one your friend, but it does make for much deeper relationships with those that last.
Some great advice I got from a friend: Do something by doing nothing. A great number of problems can be solved by simply not responding or delaying response, even beyond simple criticism.
Scott R. — May 18th, 2010, 7:44 pm
Slightly off the subject of haters, Tim, but this is the third or fourth time you’ve plugged Seneca on your blog, and I’ve gotta ask: can you recommend any of his other works for those of us who have already read (and loved!) “Letters from a Stoic” and his essay “On the Shortness of Life”? Those of us who emphatically are not among The Haters need something to tide us over till your new book comes out! As you mentioned in the video, Seneca was a very prolific writer…any suggestions for picking out the very best stuff that you haven’t already mentioned on this site?
Jason Krueger — May 18th, 2010, 7:45 pm
I love how you have comments about your tattoo. Were you testing to see if people “prematurely” commented (before finishing the vid)? That would be hilarious if you did.
I feel like your intro wasn’t as powerful as usual. Was that potentially by design due to the content of the piece?
(i.e. “fueling the fire” by having an intentionally “lukewarm” intro…thereby having the haters feel like they completely changed sides by the time you concluded).
Probably a far out idea…but it crossed my mind. Excellent as usual. You continue to inspire me bro…
Ratko — May 18th, 2010, 7:53 pm
It always puzzled me why “tim ferriss scam” was an auto-suggestion on Google when typing your name. But I admire how you’re proactively taking control of your reputation. Already ranking #8 for the term! That’s quick!
Ryan Freed — May 18th, 2010, 7:58 pm
WHAT? Tim Ferriss is a scam? Well I am so glad you told me. I guess I probably shouldn’t think for myself, do my own research and develop my own opinion, right Hater? I don’t really understand what haters are hoping to accomplish except wasting their time and existence. Now critics are great and life would be bland without them.
I just yesterday had a hater call up my business phone and proceed to yell at me about how horrible I am and how bad my business is.. They were really off base, it was still tough to hear, but I am hoping it begins to happen more and I get more used to it as I proceed through this life.
Ryan Freed — May 18th, 2010, 8:15 pm
Oh and speaking again of haters, I should probably be one. Small world here. I was recently, i believe this was in March perhaps, talking with a good friend of mine and she asked me what I was thinking about and I happen to just be contemplating 4HWW and Tony Robbins stuff and she told me her mother was going out to California I think to visit her best friend out there. Turns out her moms best friend is your Aunt! I tried to get some contact with you there but your aunt said they can never even contact you. Damn man! Evasion at its finest my man. At its finest..
Dave — May 18th, 2010, 8:15 pm
I especially liked this quote “Focus on impact, not approval”.
Great talk Tim. All this knowledge can be applied to real life interactions on top of blogging.
Come to think of it, most of the ideas mentioned are obvious or to-be-expected after the fact. But you did a great job of putting everything together and linking it into a clear and concise talk.
Thanks!
R Erickson — May 18th, 2010, 8:15 pm
If too many people “get it” it likely not worth getting. Like the video, good advice and the “new tatoo”.
Chris Dunn — May 18th, 2010, 8:21 pm
Tim,
This post was right on time for me… Last week I was having some “cafe con leche” in San Telmo when I got my first negative review online. This person attacked me personally and make claims that were totally false. I took it very personally and make the mistake of “reacting” instead of being “response-able”. Luckily, I was able to discover the true identity of the troll and put a stop to the mess. You’ve given me a new perspective on handling constructive criticism, haters, and trolls.
Anyways, thanks a million for the wisdom and inspiration… I’m in Buenos Aires right now because of you.
- Chris Dunn
Patrick Hitches — May 18th, 2010, 8:26 pm
As always, I enjoyed your video and talk.
If you need a hitman for all you’re haters, don’t hesitate to give me a shout. I set up a muse just for the occasion
.
Have a good one brotha!
Patrick Hitches
Kyle — May 18th, 2010, 8:36 pm
Being a libertarian, objectivist, and atheist has given me a lot of practice dealing with haters. The idea that the people that get it matter and the others don’t is one of the hardest things to realize real time.
Your ability to put out consistently actionable content dealing with such varying topics is amazing, bravo, good sir.
Jason Fonceca — May 18th, 2010, 8:56 pm
Dude, dude, dude… Tim. Absolutely BRILLIANT. For anyone coming into their own with big vision and world-changing ambition, this is so intensely relevant, it really touches my heart.
Thank you so, so much.
It reminds me of a couple things, both of which I’ll share with the intention that others benefit: Katt Williams comedy bit on Haters – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxxPLDZnqwA, it also brings to mind the song “Hate” by Jay-Z + Kanye West off of Jay’s latest album, BluePrint 3.
“I’m runnin’ new york, I got the may-or on my page-er
You cant fade us, you hate us
I need you, stay the-ere
I breath you, like ay-ir,
Ay-ir
Where are my haters,
I love all my haters
I love all my haters
I love all my haters”
Brandon Pearce — May 18th, 2010, 9:02 pm
Very interesting topic. Tim, I have to admit that when I first read your book, some things about it offended me, and I didn’t agree with all your philosophies. But there was so much awesome life changing stuff in there that I was able to look past some of the attitude and appreciate the content of your message.
I’ve since read it three times, and am now working less than 5 hours a week, living in Costa Rica with my family (until we want to go somewhere else), and thoroughly enjoying my life. Thanks for your influence!
The hardest part for me has been dealing with the “haters”, or just close family who don’t really understand. They see my zeal and excitement for entrepreneurship or homeschool, for example, and take it to mean that if someone likes working at a job or sends their kids to school, they’re lazy or stupid and not living up to their potential. I don’t really say that, but people take offense and take things personally. I wonder if I should write a blog post to clarify some misconceptions… I don’t mind haters if they’re people I don’t know, but it’s hard when family takes offense or thinks you’re looking down on them.
Eric — May 18th, 2010, 9:06 pm
If everybody loves you then everyone is lying to you.
Hate is a sign of success and a sign of other people’s jealousy.
Hate Me!!!!
Janmck Hilado — May 18th, 2010, 9:15 pm
Wow! Thanks for the wonderful tips Seth!
This is pretty helpful for me, especially at a very young age, to know about this things, and most especially that I’m starting to get critics on what I do and what I believed.
That just proves that what I’m doing right now is effective.
Thanks!
Janmck
NothaDood — May 18th, 2010, 9:53 pm
One of your best posts yet. You continue to refine what you say and I am sure speaking experience helps as well. Thanks again for being so practical in your desire to help people. Seriously it has helped me out a bunch in so many ways. Low info diet actually lets you think! Also (you’re gonna love this one) I am in sales and we just got a new boss. Previous boss: meeting every day @ 7:30am reading over printed out emails!!! WTF??? New boss asked me for input I told him to cut that crap out and stop wasting our precious morning time to close deals. Guess what??? No more meetings man!! Ha!!
Jose Castro-Frenzel — May 18th, 2010, 10:56 pm
This is extremely useful, in sales and in life too.
Thanks for sharing, I need to re-watch this.
Keep at it!!
- Jose
QA — May 18th, 2010, 11:00 pm
The name of this post got me thinking of a Katt Williams stand-up bit. I find it crudely insightful and somewhat inspirational, here’s the quote minus the profanity:
“All I’m saying is live your life. You’ve got to get your hustle. You got to understand that [people] is going to hate you regardless – get that out of your head that fantasy world were [people] ain’t hating on you. You gotta be grateful – you need haters. What is you complaining about? What do you think a hater’s job is? To hate, so let them do their job. What is you complaining about? Ladies, if you got 14 women hating on you you need to figure out how to get to 16 before the summer get here. What is you mad about? Fellas, if you got 20 haters you need 40 of them. What is you complaining about? If there’s any haters in here right now that don’t have nobody to hate on feel free to hate on me, sit back there and say my hair ain’t luxurious when you know it is.”
When you’re positive, successful and confident people will find a way to try to bring you down to their level either in a personally motivated jealous attack or in a business oriented way. People will constantly try to take either your happiness or your resources. As Mr. Ferris points out, its imperative to either put the fire out immediately by starving it of oxygen or bring the argument to the forefront to show the inaccuracies of their alleged statements. Although Mr. Ferriss cites Seneca and the Stoic movement, I’ve always admired the Socratic method and its ability, if the questioner was clever enough, to allow someone to paint themselves in a corner with their own statements through use of simple questions. I strongly believe that if you give a hater plenty of rope they will hang themselves. And, in the end, as they say, “cooler heads will prevail.”
Tami — May 18th, 2010, 11:20 pm
Dude, constant state of doubt about the tattoo- had to watch twice cause I couldn’t stop looking at it. But I did think that the tattoo stopped to high on the wrist to be real…haha, beyond that, excellent point(s).
Carson Boddicker — May 18th, 2010, 11:27 pm
As always, stellar advice, Tim. There is definitely a lot of internet “hating” and worthless discussion that definitely interferes with maximum effectiveness. I appreciate the tips.
Regards,
Carson Boddicker
Rhonda Swan — May 18th, 2010, 11:37 pm
Fuck you Time Ferriss!!!
You heartless self promoter.. thank you so much for giving me the inspiration to take a 3 year trip around the world with my family…that includes my little 3 year old daughter who was 1.5 years when we left.
You are such a jerk to encourage us to take my little girl, so she could learn from cultures that most kids could only read about in a text book. In fact she has more stamps on her passport than most adults….good work my friend…now she knows 3 languages and is now a fabulous kid!
In fact my internet business has catapulted because of our boldness of taking our life in our own hands…..Way to go Ferris!!
You Biggest Fan…Rhonda Swan~ Mother of The Unstoppable Family.
Tim Ferriss — May 18th, 2010, 11:56 pm
This made my very happy. Thanks, Rhonda
Renee — May 19th, 2010, 12:05 am
Thanks so much for this Tim!
I needed this today. Sometimes I let haters get me down for several days. I’m quite sensitive to it. For a while it got easier, and was like water off a duck’s back when I got a bad comment – but every now and then it feels like everyone thinks you’re an idiot.
I have bookmarked this page and will come back to it for inspiration in the future.
Many thanks and blessings,
Renee.
Hector Adrian — May 19th, 2010, 12:53 am
Querido Timoteo,
You look like a bulimic Frank Caliendo on steroids, I hate your guts, I hate you for advertising on your blog, I hate you for testing assumptions and for practicing what you preach.
I guess I’m not as good at hating as Rhonda
“Practice being foolish and stupid” Love it.
P.S. I bought my roommate your book (expanded) and he was skeptical at first “Ah 4 hours.. b.s.” now he’s talking about it all the time. I don’t own the expanded edition to be honest but I just want to spread the wisdom. He’s a very succesful studio guitar player in Los Angeles.
P.P.S. You suck
Maxim — May 19th, 2010, 1:19 am
Now I see that all the preparation you do prior to the speech is really worth it. It is just great! And tattoo move was very smart, one of the notes I took in Evernote is as follows “Illustrate the principles you’re talking about with simple and vivid example, ideally funny”.
Thank you!
Markus — May 19th, 2010, 2:09 am
I love the Colin Powell cite. I think when you stick to your values and goals and always act and react accordingly, you message will be true. This true self you are projecting will bring you enough genuine and loyal fans that all the haters don’t matter.
While dealing with haters is fun, being a hater is too! Don’t take me wrong, but it is basically the same thing. You have a strong opinion and stick to it. This also means to state this opinion in comments, reviews, interviews, etc. If you are the kind of person that gets emotional quickly, so be it. Most people can deal with it as long as some mutual respect is involved.
Ivo — May 19th, 2010, 2:33 am
OK, I’ll bite, the shirt is part of the Cato mind trick as well, is isn’t it?
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:13 pm
Shirt, buzz cut, and tattoo.
Cris Konert — May 19th, 2010, 2:35 am
The picture attracted my attention. Have you ever practiced Aikido in any way? If so, or if you’re interested, while you’re still in Amsterdam, seek out Carel Zappeij. He is a friend of my sensei and a great teacher. Or come up north to Groningen to visit our dojo (www.sjok.nl).
It feels strangely exciting knowing you’re in our country…
Sympathy and regards,
Cris
Marcel — May 19th, 2010, 3:04 am
@tim and all the other vibram wearers
Those shoes are awesome, and their awesome just because to the fact that everyones looking at them and you. I was once thinking, hey, why not giving the vibram people a call and asking them for getting money everyone asks me about the shoes or giving them a broshure would be a nice way to advertise them, maybe by letting them be worn by hot vibram girls
Get uncomfortable from time to time is not a good feeling but the feeling of growth you get after you leaned into your “fear” so to speak is phenomenal.
Ive discovered that, point 3 in your 7 principles is far more important for dealing with bullsh*** , and not merely dealing with it, but just as a starting point it should be hammered in everyones publishers or bloggers head.
“Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity.” (Colin Powell)
so true.
thanks Tim. Good Job as always.
And Fuck you for changing the life of so many to the better
Mach weiter so !
gruß marcel
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:12 pm
Danke, Marcel. Alles mit Mass und Ziel!
Tim
Yavor — May 19th, 2010, 3:11 am
Bad ass ink Tim. Do you have pics of the sleeve on flickr? I’ve downloaded the video for later viewing so I don’t multi task. At first I thought the title was a seo trick for this post (which it still is) but cool that you had a presentation.
It is interesting that at your level (of success etc.) you still give thought to ‘them haterz’.
Y.
Jalpa — May 19th, 2010, 3:34 am
“Everything I did in my life that was worthwhile, I caught hell for” – Earl Warren
Ricardo Patrocínio — May 19th, 2010, 3:59 am
I love number 5. One of our biggest fears is the fear of criticism, as soon we learn how to deal with it the better, it makes things much easier.
Miguel Marfori — May 19th, 2010, 4:25 am
Hey Tim,
This was a great post!
I believe 100% in all the tips written here (I’ll watch the video later, I still got to prepare for dinner)
You’re right… what’s the point in always answering to criticism right? Why spend 60 seconds of your life reacting to the haters when you can spend that precious time improving life? I’ll bookmark this post. I’ll share to everyone!
I have a friend who follows all these tips, although he already did them years ago. He is what I call eccentric and unique, and everytime he wears merchandise of WWE or anime, and speaks of his interests and his opinions, he has a lot of “fans” staring at him, insulting him and trying to anger him. But he doesn’t care. He does all these tips and he smiles ^_^ He always tells me it’s makes him feel great that he has “fans” like that because he is never affected by their words and actions.
Overall, awesome post! Keep it up. And by the way, your book was great! Still coming up with a good muse idea, but I’m applying your principles on my personal life and it’s actually improved day-by-day!
thanks so much Tim
Keep it cool out there!
Miguel Marfori
Chris Peacock — May 19th, 2010, 4:29 am
Haters really do serve their purpose.
They provide opposition, resistance to your cause and in their efforts to knock you down they light a fire inside that makes you work twice as hard.
Richard Branson has haters but he’s still kicking ass!
Anderson Silva has haters but he’s still kicking ass!
Tony Robbinns has haters but he’s still kicking ass!
Go get some haters and go kick some ass!
Eric — May 19th, 2010, 5:19 am
Very nice!
A dose of Tim and Emimem’s new hit single and I’m g-t-g (good-to-go). All I have to say to the haters….BRING IT!
Thanks for being you Tim and helping many to who they are…haters or not.
Ingimar Bjarni — May 19th, 2010, 5:45 am
Great advice Tim, I especially like number 6
I think an old proverb summaries internet flame wars beautifully ” Don’t argue with fools, because people from a distance can’t tell who is who”
Keep up the good work Tim, your a big inspiration.
Yuri Elkaim — May 19th, 2010, 5:47 am
Great tips Tim! You can never please everyone and you shouldn’t have to. Whoever you are and whatever you do there will always be people on both sides of the fence – those who love you and those who don’t.
And, by the way, I’ve been to that coffee shop in Amsterdam – it is awesome. And it’s such an amazing city!
Paul Bailey — May 19th, 2010, 5:57 am
As a relatively new/small podcast, we are always trying to get our listeners to post a review on itunes. To our delight someone did give us a 5 start review. We were chuffed to bits! Then horror of horrors someone then posted a review that didn’t like it, one star
. It sure was a blow to the ego I can tell you. Now looking back I’m kind of glad it was posted as it made us seriously look at what we were doing. When we did, we realised he was just blowing out his A**. So if anything it just helped us check in with ourselves first and then brush him aside. As we grow I’m sure we’ll get more positive and negative comments, both have their place and are an opportunity to empower us.
Bruceq — May 19th, 2010, 6:31 am
I wasn’t going to watch this presentation because the topic seemed boring but I’m glad that I did. Your presentation skills have improved from ‘good’ to ‘amazing’ over the past couple of years. It was a pleasure to watch! Like many others I liked the ‘tatoo’ part and got a bit of a chuckle out of it.
If I was to be slightly critical I would say that I don’t enjoy the swearing; however, you don’t hide your true personality either which is great. Cheers!
baselinedenver — May 19th, 2010, 6:36 am
Gotta ask- you’re looking pretty buff in the video, and you have been talking about the deadlift goal; are you doing Pavels 5×5 workouts now, instead of the 1 set to failure? Just started the 5×5′s, and wondering if you tweaked that idea, or just started using it. Thanks!
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:10 pm
Hey B,
I’m about 15 lbs heavier than usual in the video. For max strength, the 5×5 will work better than to failure. For the deadlifts, I’m using a different program, which I’ll outline completely in the new book
Tim
Rachelle — May 19th, 2010, 6:37 am
Loved the Keynote … you do have to just laugh at some of the insane peeps out there. Fortunately I haven’t experienced any *haters* yet …
Chris Reimer — May 19th, 2010, 6:48 am
I’ve been attacked on Twitter for some of my tee designs – I’ve been accused of stealing designs, having crappy designs, etc. I engaged the people criticizing me, but did not fight with them. I’m not sure what was gained. I used to think that no response = they win. Of course, when you respond = they win.
As that bloated computer said in War Games, “The only winning move is not to play.”
Cynthia Loomis — May 19th, 2010, 6:50 am
Timothy,
Thanks for sharing such solid advice (always) w/ the world. You are a revolutionary.
I enjoyed the quote from Chairman Powell so much that I had to do a little more reading on it and him last night. A synopsis of his book, My American Journey, drafted by Oren Hariri, gave the perfect quote to sum up your contributions through your writings, blog culture and presentations: “Good Leadership encourages everyone’s Evolution.”
The simple fact with your Haters is that they know they are unable to evolve, too afraid to escape their shackles, and deep down it enrages them to fear that they might have more of a choice about how to live their lives. And, of course, they blame you and not themselves for the feelings of inadequacy.
Keep on Scammin’ in the Free World!
Respectfully,
C. Loomis
Daniel Snyder — May 19th, 2010, 7:01 am
You know when you consider that people taking things personally is just a statistical likelyhood, it becomes easier to not take their stuff personally in return… (did that make sense?) Realizing that some people are just hard wired that way, does make them easier to deal with.
Brian Kevin Johnston — May 19th, 2010, 7:35 am
Tim- Thanks for this article…. I was just thinking the other day about all the AMAZING blogs that I am blessed to read daily/weely/monthly… I am trying to “do a little prunning” (Brogan, Godin, Rowse, Joel, were 100% YES), and this BLOG post confirmed I MUST be pay attention to your insight… So, THANK YOU… Best, Brian-
Bob — May 19th, 2010, 7:55 am
Wow. For myself incredibly spot on and timely.
Work in local government and these are unsurprisingly trying times. Special interests groups have been especially virulent recently so a fresh perspective, even coming from a different direction, is helpful and gets the creative juices flowing. Thanks!
Sarah — May 19th, 2010, 7:56 am
#7. #7 #7 #7. It’s not haters, but lovers who disapprove, who can hold you back the most. The complete aloneness of no one else understanding or believing, on your own “just you and God”, really cultivates that “Keep Calm and Carry On” in the depth of your soul.
Ian Coburn — May 19th, 2010, 8:11 am
This is some of your best advice to date, I think. When I went from comedy to writing, this was a tough transition for me to make–to realize I couldn’t and shouldn’t worry about the criticism as much as I was or even pay it attention in many cases. That’s because when you get heckled as a comedian, you get to face your heckler head-on and you deal with them because the audience expects you to; if you don’t, the heckler can take over the room. I rarely got heckled in comedy in part because you have to be gutsy to go toe-to-toe with a comedian, but in today’s age of anonymity with the web… hecklers can hide. Some of the biggest hecklers for any of us are often the ones who don’t even read our material; they just read a blurb, passage, and often have the concepts completely wrong because of it. You have to shrug them off and trust that all the good feedback will illustrate their criticisms aren’t even relevant. I wish you had written this a few years ago! What took you so long? Get it together! That Tim Ferriss is too slow with his posts, he… (I couldn’t resist.)
Dan Shure — May 19th, 2010, 8:13 am
Tim
Quick “case in point”. I participate in a piano teacher’s forum. Recently I made a post referencing a heavily opinionated article I’d written on my blog. It was in response to a very divided debate on the fundamentals of teaching piano.
Someone responded in big bold letters “BORING!” (Google Analytics later revealed he had spent 0:00 seconds “reading” to come up with this thoughtful analysis.)
At first reaction, it caught me off guard. But because of your book and your message, I was HAPPY to see someone respond like this. I kept thinking about all the things you talk about, and when you really start doing something important, you’ll get strong reactions from both sides, creating conversation and debate.
And you know what effect his big bold “BORING!” really had? It was like a giant red flag that said to everyone else “stop and read this!”. I got more hits than usual on my site because of it.
Thanks again for the constant inspiration.
Brian — May 19th, 2010, 8:39 am
Tim, as you’ve become more well-known and had a larger impact over the years, so in proportion has the criticism and vitriol seemed to grow in proportion. Thanks for constantly staying positive and keeping things in perspective, and for directing so much of your energy outward.
Joshua Uebergang — May 19th, 2010, 8:40 am
Tim, your body is looking good! Can’t wait for “From Rapid Fat Loss to Strongmen”.
I was about to say “Put some Flickr photos up of your tats. I know they’ll have some philosophy behind them!” Haha! I knew you’d have a reason behind it.
With your good point on being non-reactive, a point I’ll add to that is to question why you were reactive in the first place. Carl Jung said we project our inner turmoils and shadows onto others. What frustrates us on the outside often signals something unresolved on the inside. This way, your critics actually help you grow as a human being.
Byron — May 19th, 2010, 8:43 am
Hey, great presentation! Its hard to believe there are so many haters out there. Don’t these people have anything better to do?
Also, una pregunta… Ahora estoy en Buenos Aires. Puedes recomendar cual es tu Malbec favorito y si tu conoces una buena escuela de Tango aca? Yo habia probado aprender salsa cuando estuve en Bogota pero fue impossible! Tu Dijiste Tango es mas facil, la verdad? Gracias por la recomendaciones… Ciao!!
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:07 pm
Byron,
Respuestas:
1. Clos de los Siete Malbec 2004
2. Horacio Godoy en “La Viruta” o Gabriel Misse
Suerte!
Tim
Mukul Verma — May 19th, 2010, 8:47 am
Tim, this is one of the best pieces in a while.
A great lesson is that when we start out, dont expect to get it right, learn and grow from it.
Of course you will be pissed on your first hater, but after time, master dealing with it.
Great take away
Cheers,
Mukul
Alex Thompson — May 19th, 2010, 8:47 am
Awesome post! I always look for your responses to the posts, to see how you handle the rude ones, and have always been impressed at how cordial you are towards those who are undeserving of it. This “how to” post helps show your thought process on it. Thank you for sharing.
Mike Schmick — May 19th, 2010, 8:50 am
Very timely for me. Thank you Sir!
Mike Burngasser — May 19th, 2010, 9:09 am
Tim,
I noticed you started advertising on the blog. As far as blog advertising goes, I really don’t mind yours.
Not too “in your face” like most of the desperate bloggers with 1,000,000+ alexa ranks. Very chilled out.
I’m really curious though; were you waiting for critical mass this whole time, or is this just a short term experiment?
Also, do you plan on testing several mediums (CPM Banners, CPA Programs, Media Buys, Affiliate Programs, etc.) in the future?
It’d be interesting to see which approach works the best with a high-traffic blog like yours…
Theo Lopes Garcia — May 19th, 2010, 9:13 am
It is probably the best post by Tim ever.
Mike T Nelson — May 19th, 2010, 9:31 am
Great stuff Tim and very useful!
I get nervous if I don’t have anyone unsubscribe off my newsletter or all the comments I ever get a positive. It is much worse if I get no interaction—yawn.
I would second Mike’s comments above about advertising too.
Excited to hear a deadlift update soon on your quest for 500 lbs. Whoo ha
Rock on!
Mike T Nelson PhD(c)
John Paton — May 19th, 2010, 9:37 am
How come no one laughed in the video?
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:06 pm
Europeans are pretty quiet at this type of stuff. Not as quiet as Japanese, but quite reserved compared to Yanks. The last day was a little looser and had more laughs all around.
Or maybe I’m just not funny? Could be
Tim
Duane Triplet — May 19th, 2010, 9:53 am
I just found your website through a twitter feed. Wow! Great presentation! Will buy the book for sure and the read the books you suggested.
God Bless
Arthur — May 19th, 2010, 10:00 am
As a blogger, I can really relate to this and cannot wait to show the world a new way (or your way, just with a little more of my own flava),
I’ve always written and had good responses when I felt really really positive, but I’ve never even tried when I was really really negative. That’s because I always feel amazing – that’s what I thought.
But the truth is, there are times when I feel extremely annoyed (in general, about those who judge and label and compare) and however brief, when I am annoyed it’s pretty intense – and I lacked the awareness to see the opportunity there to turn that annoyance into value.
“Now I know, and knowing is half the battle – G.I. Joe” – haha.
Randal — May 19th, 2010, 10:32 am
Tim, if I was a girl I would want to have your baby.
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:05 pm
Buahahahahaha… well, I am still looking for the right woman. I appreciate the sentiment
Tim
Dane Rose — May 2nd, 2013, 7:20 pm
Hi Tim,
Thanks for this post. The amount of unpleasantness I feel around criticism has led me to stay 90% smaller than I could be. I’m still feeling into how much I want to adjust my skills at dealing with criticism vs. just living successfully in my own anonymous pocket. I’m a big believer in sustainability, beginning with relationships: If a relationship does not give both people more well-being than it takes and is not supporting one of my deeper values I end it. I’ve written six books but limited publicity so that mostly friends know about them (most of my books were written with friends in mind). One of them is an intricate analysis of relationship chemistry. If you’d like a free copy of it (I won’t mention the title since you may have some guideline about advertising and besides someone else might read it and complain about it [smile]) I can e-mail you a PDF or send you an amazon link.
I think I read about your enjoyment of Thailand. Thailand is my favorite country right now so I wrote one free book for Thai women to help them better date Farang and another for Farang to be more respectful and successful with Thais. I give the book to Thai women before dating them as a screening device to insure win/win. The one I think you might enjoy is more analytical and focused on an outline of all the variables I’ve observed in chemistry and how to mix those for desired results. I love a lot of the business greats, including Drucker and aspire to a world in which realtionships and well-being are as passionately engineered as the best run companies and scientific missions of today.
Best,
Dane
Ned Creed — May 19th, 2010, 10:34 am
Your timing is prime. I am on my way to Hong Kong to explore an outlandish business venture. My chances for success are slim, but there is no way I can sit idle and wonder.
Enjoy every sandwich.
Cheers-
Bill — May 19th, 2010, 10:38 am
Everyone can determine their own definition of happiness. The energy required to generate “Hate” toward anyone or anything can be put to much greater uses. Life is either positive or negative. It is truly your choice. That is the lesson of the book and blog. Your life at this point is the sum of all the choices you have made and when some people face that realization they can not handle the state of their reality and hate is the result. Continue to live a big life and continue leading by example.
gary misner — May 19th, 2010, 10:52 am
So i never make comments but this one is right up my ally. i’ve been testing people my whole life and when i wear silver shoes or funny hats, it’s not so much to gain attention but to weed out where i want attention from. I figure if someone has something bad to say about my attire they’re not worth my time or explanation, but those who are attracted to it in some weird way are somehow on my level of openness, which i am also attracted to. i’ve been lucky to be confident enough to take the hits to find the better my whole life, and i would recommend for people who dont have this confidence to find it and find it fast.
regards,
gary
Roger Burdette — May 19th, 2010, 10:57 am
Excellent Tim! Who cares about the minority of people that slander and just don’t get it? Use it as fuel to catapult yourself further into your venture or drive you to reach even more people. I like the Wayne Dyer metaphor with the orange. “Whatever is in the orange will come out when squeezed”. In other words, when someone pushes your buttons, if hate, stress, etc. is on the inside, it will come out. Being at peace with what you do and knowing you have value to add will ensure nothing but a good response when “squeezed” and may even help us look objectively at ourselves when we do encounter criticism. That’s the theory anyway. (I’m still practicing) Imagine if you only changed ONE person’s life and he/she was able to spend more time with their family because of it and no one else “got it”. Wouldn’t it still be worth it? Sure it would.
David — May 19th, 2010, 11:08 am
Great video. And the tattoo stunt was hilarious. I read your book when it came out, and then the updated edition as well. Totally changed my perspective about what I’m trying to achieve in my business. Thank you.
Matt — May 19th, 2010, 11:27 am
LOL, nice fake tattoo sleeve! In true Tim Ferriss style.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/silvertje/4562885664/sizes/l/
http://www.flickr.com/photos/silvertje/4562255375/sizes/l/
I somehow have a feeling that it relates to the topic of your talk…hmmm.
It was a great talk by the way. Great actionable tips that can be used in daily life. Thanks Tim!
Chris R — May 19th, 2010, 11:40 am
Hey Tim,
Will you be doing a post on how your experiment with advertising on your blog is going?
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:03 pm
Hi Chris,
I hope to soon. Need more data first!
Tim
Leonard Irwin — May 19th, 2010, 11:49 am
Tim
People who react to your (our) actions or words are really just expressing their own reasons for not having the strength to do it themselves
Far too often, those who react and critize others do so, because deep down inside, they desire to do whatever it is that you are doing. That feeling of I want to do this but am scared shitless to do it. The four hour work week, really upset, the workplace establishment.
There are people who desire to have your richness in time but fear it. They say what will I do with all that time. Sometimes people are just afraid to let go of the self they have made in a particular job. Their self image is wrapped around the comort of knowing who they are in relation to their employment. They fear unlearning how to be their real self. Afraid to let go of their medicore and fearful life.
Haters in the end I take are just verifying that we are doing something right. In drama school we were told publicity is publicity is publicity. It is when there is no reaction that we need to worry.
Great video and post.
Martín Alejandro Carmona Selva — May 19th, 2010, 11:58 am
Tim,
Thanks for the wonderful post!.
I have a question for you and that’s related to you answer about what to write about.
I also write -most of the times- about what I’m passionate at! I’ve written tons of post -some of them cool, from my point of view but I don’t get lots of readers.
So, do you think you need to be ‘known’ to become a know blogger or, can you become known -not famous, but read- just by a blog?
I’ve been ‘blogging’ since 1997 -when the word wasn’t even invented- but, nonetheless, I cannot get that much attention.
Is there anything I can do to get more readers? -I don’t care that much either since I write for myself, to keep on living, hut it’ll be nice!-
Thank you again for helping me so much with the book and the blog! I’m looking forward the new book and the new edition -which I will get as a birthday present-, and, one last thing: Is there any way to stop the addiction to fivevingers?
Jermaine Andre — May 19th, 2010, 12:15 pm
I just posted a note regarding Haters on my Facebook page because a lot of my fans were asking about how I deal with them. I’m an MMA fighter, Actor & security certifier who holds 2 World titles, 4 other titles and train & provide some of the top bodyguards on the planet. I alwasy say just consider your source when dealing with Haters and remember that their main objective is to hopefully get into your head to waste your time. Also, anyone who would listen to a Hater and try to repeat what that Hater has voiced about you is also a Hater so ignore the ignorant. Haters are little bugs that you may need to simply brush off at times. No one will ever respect or like a Hater & they know it and they just fills them more with hate. Feel sorry for the pathetic Hater who has to spend his day drinking “Haterade” & hoping that someone will pay attention to the diarrhea that he’s slidding from his (or her) tongue. Furthermore, still keep your basic awareness tight becasue some Haters can be so full of hate that they may attempt something where you may need to deal with them accordingly! The Haterism in my area has gotten so bad that I designed a course called “Andre’s HaterProof” that teaches young women & men how to mentally and physically deal with Haters. Remember that success breeds enemies so if you don’t want enemies, don’t be successful!
Torumoy — May 19th, 2010, 12:27 pm
Hey Tim, great post. Great video. Probably one of the best you have ever posted. Watched it like I was watching a movie.
On a different note. I like your blog, but still I haven’t read T4HWW. The only reason is it is not available in India. I searched in all the local shops and also ordered in some, but couldn’t get a copy. Any suggestion how can I read the book?
Warren T — May 19th, 2010, 12:57 pm
Someday I hope to have as many haters as you. 35 languages that’s impressive
Hater — May 17th, 2011, 9:29 am
Fuck you Tim Ferriss! You’re a sham and a scam and a sham and a scam and a sham and a scam!
I’m going to keep my uptight, 8 hour day, miserable lifestyle and finally retire at age 70 and you can screw your four hour work week because I lack the brain cells to understand half of it (*sob*).
Sincerely, a hater
Hater, Hater Bo Bater Banana Fana Fo Fater | The Investor Insights — May 19th, 2010, 1:06 pm
[...] Here’s the entire article (with video). [...]
Tim Fredriksson — May 19th, 2010, 1:41 pm
Hi Tim,
my name is also Tim. I like your book, blog and ideas. However I am quite upset about the comment by “Tim Feriss” in my blog.
Best Regards,
Tim Fredriksson
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 4:01 pm
Hi Tim,
I’m not sure who that Tim Feriss is. Wasn’t me. If that’s link baiting, clever. But if so, please don’t do it.
Tim
toby — May 19th, 2010, 1:54 pm
Thank you, as always, for a thought provoking post. I almost always find a reference in your posts to something to read, watch, or think about that is of value to me. Much of the time those references come from the comments, so really, thank you commenters who take the time to elaborate in a thoughtful and productive manner on the subject at hand.
Nadja Specht — May 19th, 2010, 2:26 pm
Great talk Tim. I really like the simplicity of your points. Our society tends to make things so much more complicated than they actually are. We should focus more on how we can actually stick to these points – that’s were the real challenge for us humans is.
I had to laugh about the quietness of the audience – very (northern) European indeed! I am German (living in the US) and think it would have been even more “orderly” in Germany :0).
Allan McKay — May 19th, 2010, 3:11 pm
super awesome, very informative and on a very useful topic, thanks Tim!
Bill Lang — May 19th, 2010, 3:13 pm
Tim… Number 3 is spot on. A CEO of a Fortune 100 company once shared me a 2,000 year old story on this theme. His message, You cannot Get 100% of the People On board 100% of the time. For example he said, look at Jesus Christ…. even amongst his top 12 followers he still had trouble with that Bloke Iscariot. Let me know when we will next see you downunder! Bill Lang
How do you deal with haters? — May 19th, 2010, 3:36 pm
[...] [Read More] If you enjoyed this article, please consider sharing it! [...]
Stephen Wise — May 19th, 2010, 4:46 pm
(Re: your comment response to Ivo)
What tattoo?
Alex A — May 19th, 2010, 5:10 pm
Haters are part of life, but I take solace in the comforting words of the great Dave Chappelle:
Haters wanna hate,
Lovers wanna love,
I don’t even want,
None of the above,
I want to piss on you.
Yes I do, I’ll piss on you,
I’ll pee on you.
Keep rockin Tim
Jenneil — May 19th, 2010, 5:23 pm
I could feel this post coming…
Glad to see you are able to ride the critical waves Tim. As a 99%er, I think it is perfect timing to post and say thanks for your inspiration.
I have to give you some serious credit for motivating me in some very positive ways. Thanks to your inspiration, I have created a pretty decent website and will be embarking on a trip around the world in 2011.
Nathan Schmitt — May 19th, 2010, 5:31 pm
Thanks for posting this, Tim. I’m a university student and get a surprising amount of criticism for standing out by having a passion and goals–despite that I try to downplay it in certain contexts. It has certainly conditioned me to develop internalized critics; something I think a lot of people who care about what they do have to deal with. I’m getting much better at dealing with critics (internalized and external) but I really appreciate this post not only because it’s something I can rarely identify with people about, but also because you suggest actionable solutions.
Also, you may have read him but I think you’d really, really enjoy John Dewey’s work (pragmatist philosopher largely concerned with education). I think Dewey is to contemporary philosophy as Seneca was to ancient–focused on the practical connection of philosophy to action. I’m beginning work on a thesis that will explore actionability in pragmatist philosophy, eventually ending with the development of program aimed to equip (especially underprivileged) students with the basic cognitive tool set that seems to be common across every field (i.e., basic understanding of logic, language, asking good questions, motivation, theory of knowledge, etc). Anyway, a statement by Dewey on his approach:
“This is [...] a first rate test of the value of any philosophy which is offered us: Does it end in conclusions which, when they are referred back to ordinary life experience and their predicaments, render them more significant, more luminous to us, and make our dealings more fruitful?”
-John Dewey, “Experience and Nature”
Andrew Hill — May 19th, 2010, 5:31 pm
Tim, great talk. I started my entrepreneurial craziness as a freshmen, in high school. I’m now a senior and graduating soon, but over those four years I’ve been slowly learning everything you spoke about and can relate to it all personally, although would have loved to just be able to hear you speak four years ago. My favourite saying on success is “Prepare to be misunderstood” I first heard it from an interview on PBS with amazon’s CEO. In high school it has been especially poignant since students aren’t supposed to start business and work for themselves. I also tend to wear different shoes from the norm (no vibrams yet, soon though) and at first I’ve always gotten weird looks then you get the first person to get the similar shoes then the next follower and six months later they’re common, it’s crazy.
Something I’m surprised you didn’t mention was times of responding to haters. For example I’ve learned to never respond to a comment or situation or email while I’m sick; I learned this the hard way from a past experience. Nor do I respond after 10pm on a week day if I’m on a normal sleep schedule getting up at 6am or earlier. I also do the same as you and wait at least a day or two before responding to certain comments, by then I decide if it is even worth it or should be done in another manner altogether.
I had decided to never do interviews for media as well after a local paper published a story on me and the reporter said he would send it for my review before publication and that never happened and it ended up on the front of the local paper with some major errors. Yet, now with the advice to record all interviews for personal insurance I may do this in the future so I want to thank you for the great tip. If you’re ever around New England this summer or Tempe this year (I’m attending ASU starting this fall) Lunch is on me.
-Andrew
James Kelly — May 19th, 2010, 5:47 pm
insightful … thanks for posting!
Matthew V — May 19th, 2010, 6:01 pm
It’s great to know that you read your comments and manage them responsibly.
If I’m honest I retained from leaving comments as I believed I would be talking to myself, or your VA’s, but I like it that you still have the respect to look after your community.
p.s. Great to see you bulking up, what can you dead lift now?
Tim Ferriss — May 19th, 2010, 6:23 pm
Hi Matthew,
The only reason I have this blog is because of the community, and a big part of that is — of course — hearing you all. I injured my left leg a bit, but I was last around 430-450 x 3 reps. I’ll get there
Tim
Brandon Kepke — May 19th, 2010, 6:16 pm
How is your shirt part of the cato mind trick?
Yukie — May 19th, 2010, 6:18 pm
I was fooled. I thought you gave up on Onsen! That fake tattoo was nicely made though…
One of the commenter’s stories reminded me how we were influenced by our surrounded culture/circumstances. I count it as a first half, but at the same time we are responsible for the other half. We can nourish this ability to response. If we keep calm and carry on, “responsibility” can be a meaningful word.
Thank you for sharing/revealing who you were when you released the book. Sounds a bit different person.
I immensely enjoyed reading the menu. I think I can survive in Netherlands. Thank you for the link.
Stephen Wise — May 19th, 2010, 6:29 pm
I finally watched the video – I see what tattoo in mention. Nice sleeve!
Martin Berkhan — May 19th, 2010, 7:29 pm
“I was last around 430-450 x 3 reps. I’ll get there”
Pretty good. If you’re 145-150, that is.
jk
Alex — May 19th, 2010, 7:33 pm
From the lyrics of the modern philosopher Chamillionaire:
“I wanna show all of my haters love, this song’s for you,
If you acted like me and I was in your shoes,
I’d probably hate on me too.”
Keep doing your thing Tim!
Chris Hunt — May 19th, 2010, 8:25 pm
WHAT are you talking about…
…is probably the thought going through the head of the guy I shared an elevator with recently!
I don’t read the news either Tim, anything important always filters to me some how.
As I’m sure you’re aware Britain has a new prime minister (PM), and CLEARLY – from the look on this guys face – anybody who didn’t know this the instant it happened comes from Mars!
Danny Davis — May 19th, 2010, 10:40 pm
I kept looking at your arm while you were speaking trying to figure out what kind of tattoo it was, than a few minutes into the video you let me know I was wasting my time when you revealed it was it was a trick. Still though I thought it looked neat.
Tyler Sorensen — May 19th, 2010, 11:19 pm
Hi Tim,
Killer blog post. I am going to implement the Comment Rules right away.
Especially on our high traffic blogs and will definitely be putting in a (Thanks to Tim Ferris for the inspiration at the end and add a link back to this page). And no I won’t copy yours 
Great stuff.
Tyler
Rob Macdonald — May 19th, 2010, 11:24 pm
Tim,
Just watched your speech after it was sent to me by someone who thought I should see it. There is a small but vocal group who have taken it upon themselves to publish hatchet jobs at regular intervals on a television show I am involved with and it was starting to take it’s toll on me. ‘Why are they taking it so personally?’ I’d ask myself ‘it’s just a television show for F^*K’s sake!’. The haters were starting to win as it was, as you say in your speech, beginning to take over my life and was preventing me from getting on with what I needed to get on with. While I could rationalise intellectually about the situation it was difficult to control the emotional aspects of it. I intend to print your 7 steps and adopt them daily. So thanks for the advice.
Tim Ferriss — May 20th, 2010, 12:33 am
Hi Rob,
Thanks for the comment, man. My pleasure entirely.
Kia kaha, as your neighbors would say
Tim
Hater lieben lernen | realloc's asylum — May 20th, 2010, 12:44 am
[...] halte es da lieber mit Tim Ferris, dessen gestriger Beitrag “Tim Ferriss Scam! Practical Tactics for Dealing with Haters” sich ebenfalls mit dem Phänomen auseinandersetzt. Das eingebettete Video, welches während seines [...]
Cory Boatright — May 20th, 2010, 1:38 am
Tim,
It was great seeing you in San Francisco too bro. I couldn’t believe you hosted the party in that ship. That was seriously freaking cool bro.
Remember… be a servant,
Cory Boatright
Short Sale Specialist
Blaize — May 20th, 2010, 1:49 am
if what you are saying is true and you can measure your success by the number of haters you have – then anc youth league leader; julius malema must be pretty damn successful
jokes aside – great article – thanks for sharing. cheers
Marcel — May 20th, 2010, 3:14 am
Hey Tim,
danke für dein Kommentar auf mein Kommentar haha,
Regarding the new book,
1 Questions:
Can you tell us how the parts nutrition and excercising will be distributed in the book (i’m thinking about something like 50%nutr, 50% excercise )
thanks.
marcel
Richard — May 20th, 2010, 3:23 am
Nice tips Tim. Dealing with haters is one of the most character building things in life.
Cassie S. — May 20th, 2010, 4:50 am
Tim:
You helped me to appeal a wrongful unemployment claim made on my daycare business!
I read this post for the first time yesterday morning. It was as if the stars aligned as I knew I was scheduled for a phone hearing yesterday afternoon to appeal a ridiculous unemployment claim, made by an over-reactive, delusional ex-employee who made EVERY issue personal.
Because of your point #6 copied below (read and re-read before the hour-long hearing), I was able to remain calm, focused and maturely OBJECTIVE.
I feel fantastic this morning and am able to finally release this person back to herself. I am also releasing myself from thinking about the bad situation she created; it’s done. No more anger or frustration either.
My husband is taking me away this weekend for our wedding anniversary and I feel emotionally free and super-charged to LIVE WELL and thoroughly enjoy myself!
I am still working on my muse–and my new parenting website, thanks to your 4HWW blueprint!!
Thank you, Tim.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
6. “Living well is the best revenge.” (George Herbert)
“The best way to counter-attack a hater is to make it blatantly obvious that their attack has had no impact on you,” Ferriss advises. “That, and [show] how much fun you’re having!” Ferriss goes on to say that the best revenge is letting haters continue to live with their own resentment and anger, which most of the time has nothing to do with you in particular. “If a vessel contains acid and you pour some on an object, it’s still the vessel that sustains the most damage,” Ferriss says. “Don’t get angry, don’t get even — focus on living well and that will eat at them more than anything you can do.”
Griffin Boyce — May 20th, 2010, 4:51 am
I really enjoyed the I’ve always found it interesting how “hater logic” works. In one breath, they’ll say that you have no expertise that startups need, and that they see you everywhere constantly and that you’re a PR machine (TED comments). Which of course doesn’t logically follow at all.
I’ll do some anti-hate for a moment and give a big “THANKS!” Your book gave me the tools to run small research studies very cheaply and ensure product-market fit. On top of just being an awesome lifestyle tool.
There are a few key people that seem un-contactable, except maybe through twitter. *cough*Tim Ferriss*cough*
Tim Ferriss — May 21st, 2010, 2:58 am
Roger Burdette — May 20th, 2010, 4:56 am
Tim,
Forget about the deadlifts unless you are going to compete at some point. Good basic exercise, but over long periods of time, deadlifts=back surgery. Much better and safer ways to bulk up. At 44 I’m still 215 at 6’2″ with a 33″ waist, but I wished I could have traded in some of those deadlifts and squats for other exercises that are less stressful on the joints and focus more on the muscle itself. Just not a good long-term strategy for fitness…ask me how I know.
gmoke — May 20th, 2010, 12:15 pm
Saw Nicholas Taleb, author of The Black Swan, speak last night. One of the things he mentioned is how he handles hate mail. He said that he reads his hate mail because it is always more interesting and varied than the fan mail.
Victoria Vives — May 20th, 2010, 12:47 pm
Very awesome Tim! Thank you for the good advice. Also, it is nice to see a more emotional side of you! Much Love, V
Gary — May 20th, 2010, 1:15 pm
Most people resent the success of others.
Daniel Fryar — May 20th, 2010, 1:23 pm
“The Risk of Insult is the Price of Clarity.”
-The Wizard of Ads
Daniel S. McClintock — May 20th, 2010, 2:40 pm
Tim, great post as always – I’ve found that dealing with haters usually boils down to whether you give a damn what other people think or not. And living to please others is a downhill road to a very unhappy and empty lifestyle. No matter who you are, you’ll be loved and you’ll be hated. Revel in both, it only means you touched a chord in someone else’s life that probably needed to be touched.
Dave — May 20th, 2010, 2:45 pm
Hey Tim, I can imagine what it must be like to become so well know so fast and have built your business around your personality.
I have a friend that owns a numbered company here in B.C. if anyone wants to talk to him or sue him they have a hard time even finding where he is, never mind his name or phone number. Looks like your out on the other end of the scale.
I once had an art show back when I used to make art, I had a comments book and the only comment left was “your art is to expensive. PS, way to expensive.”
And that was only in a throw away book and not online where anyone can look.
When I heard about the guy with the comment something about whats it like to be remembered like 6 minute abs, it did ring a bell though.
I read the book (Four hour work week) and enjoy checking your blog out, but cant help thinking, hey that guy Tim, bit of a cad!
Or as we used to say back in the U.K. when someone tried to feed us a line, “you can’t con a con man.” I think the book was well worth the money.
After I read it and thought about it, reminded me of something I heard one time about how do you make a million dollars?
Well you write a book called how to make a million dollars, in it you instruct people to write a book called ‘how to make a million dollars and you sell a million of them for a dollar each.?
Loved the tattoo sleeve!
Cheers, Dave
J — May 20th, 2010, 3:17 pm
Hi Tim,
I just watched your video, which was awesome.
I’ve wanted to thank you for quite awhile. A friend recommended your book. It has given me a whole new perspective.
I have recently started a new company. I am not yet blindingly successful, but I will be.
Failure is not an option. Ha!
I have an entirely new focus and am happier than I have ever been. I’ve traveled all over the world and truly wanted to live in other countries (sequentially) since my one experience in Luxembourg was so positive. Your words have given me the motivation to do what I’ve wanted to do instead of taking a job and living out my days in one spot. I will be letting you know of my success soon!
Thank you,
Jackie
A.H.A. — May 20th, 2010, 3:26 pm
I am currently writing something called “The ferrisspunk manifesto”. This gave me some new ideas to add, thanks
A.H.A. — May 20th, 2010, 3:36 pm
Dude, those psychos on your voicemail and Flickr are pretty frakking scary. Mind blogging a bit about your views on physical security?
Joe Cross — May 20th, 2010, 4:08 pm
AWESOME 7 PRINCIPLES…NEEDED TO HEAR IT!…Always seen your book but never bought it….NOW I WILL! look for me at the TOP!
Alex — May 20th, 2010, 4:38 pm
Things to note:
1) Looks like you put on a ton of muscle (can’t wait to see the regiment in the next book)
2) Kick-ass Tat!
3) RANDOM EPISODE RANDOM EPISODE GIVE US MORE RANDOM EPISODE!
4) Most importantly, enjoyed the talk.
Erin — May 20th, 2010, 6:50 pm
Tim,
This post had many good comments and I enjoyed it as usual.
However I notice that you are posting much less often (2x/month ave for this year) and when you do post it is usually a guest post or rehash (like this one). It seems you are saving up all your good stuff for another marketing blitz when your new book comes out. That will be many many months from now, and you may be watching your audience slip away.
Increasing the difficulty in maintaining your audience are these new advertising features. Don’t know which thing it is specifically (gravatar? tweetmeme?) but your pages load much much slower than usual. Vimeo seems impossible to work with under peak hours, although that may be a problem on their end.
In summary: I am concerned that the blog will slowly lose its entertainment value and audience. Sneak peaks of your new book, more Random, or posts in general couldn’t hurt.
With Respect,
Erin
PS: Halloween Costume: The shirt, haircut, and tattoo sleeve just SCREAM “Christian Rock Artist”. : )
Bailey Jones — May 20th, 2010, 7:59 pm
Can’t wait for the new book to drop!
No matter what the haters say they should recognize at the very least the intelligence that you possess. The way the title functions both as an oxygen reducer and adding gasoline is very clever. I am a big fan but also acknowledge a few critical points that others argue against you, most noticeably the lack of solid proof for a few of your personal claims in the OG book as well as a few sketchy case studies when researched. However, I admire how strongly you stick to your principles and practice what you preach (“polarizing”). I would be proud to be considered a member of the 1000 fan ideal. Your words reach father than you know.
Thanks for everything,
Bailey
ZMac — May 20th, 2010, 8:51 pm
Bravo – by all means don’t be a playa hater! Might as well get what you can, even if you step all over of the little people along the way. You too can be one of those frat boys/sor girls with business major, take the vic, even if the $ of your investors goes south. Stop the hate right.
ZMac
Melodie Moore — May 20th, 2010, 9:05 pm
Hey Tim,
Just like to send a big high five. I am glad to be one of the lovers. One of the people who supports rather than belittles. Constructive criticism, criticism for the sake of growth. I think i have a whole new love for it. I am glad for your words as the resonate with me and inspire me to have faith in my passion. You rock.
Hey Chris.
For every person who thinks your funny post is offending there’s a person who thinks it funny. A person may have thought of you as some corporate guy who just wants to make money. That person’s perception of you has changed. Maybe he see’s you as just another guy trying to make life a little lighter. I’d want to be friends with that guy. I want to buy from my friends not some guy wearing a nice suit with a frown.
Keep laughing, what’s life without laughter?
Much love people.
Its a beautiful night. Go outside and see for yourself.
David — May 20th, 2010, 11:46 pm
I just watched this again. Really great presentation. A lot to think about.
Bastiaan — May 20th, 2010, 11:50 pm
Tim, first of all: respect! You’re a role model for more people than you probably can imagine. Just think of it as a pan full of lobster. Ever noticed that if one crawls out, the others pull him back in? I’d like to think of haters as that majority of the lobsters..
Second, being an European that has travelled to the US on several occasions, I can totally agree on the, what seems like a, lack of enthousiasm during your presentations. Especially over here in Nederland people really have a ‘C’ mentality. A famous Dutch verb is: “Just be normal, that’s crazy enough”. Doesn’t that just say it all? Probably if you compare it to giving a presentation in say Italy, you’ll already notice a big difference. So don’t take it personal, we *do* love you!
Finally I have a question on perseverance.. Where do you keep the strength to persevere in what you believe in, even when things don’t seem to go as you hoped for, and all the haters are talking you down?
Keep being our inspiration!
Cheers,
Bas
Tim Ferriss — May 21st, 2010, 2:54 am
Thanks for the great lobster analogy and comment, Bas! I get the strength from picking my tight group of friends carefully. They are all supportive, positive, and ambitious in their own right, so we all deal with idiots and haters. It puts things in perspective to 1) have friends handling the same things, and 2) see ubersuccessful (in their areas of expertise) people remaining unfazed by idiots and haters.
Hope that helps!
Tim
Matt Lake — May 21st, 2010, 2:36 am
Hi Tim,
Great video.
I know it’s very insignificant in terms of the whole presentation, but one comment you made during the Q & A at the end really resonated quite well with me, and that was… “passionate is a very over-used term” and that you prefer to choose things that you’re excited about (with regards to writing blog posts)… something along those lines.
My question is… do you use that philosophy when it comes to persuing business ventures?
I too agree that “passionate” is a very over-used term.
It’s just you get people left right and centre saying when it comes to starting a business, you should follow your passion. Well what if you don’t exactly know what your passion is? Or if there’s not a market for it?
Or you get people that say you should start a business based on your passion… and then also say you should start with your expertise. Well what if you’re an expert at something you’re not passionate about?
So yeh, my question is: do you think persuing a business idea that you’re simply excited or curious about is enough? Is that what you do?
I’d appreciate your insight on this if you wouldn’t mind… it frustrates the hell of me sometimes!
Anyway, thanks Tim,
Matt
Abby — May 21st, 2010, 5:33 am
I haven’t had lots of personal experience with haters, but I’ve seen them in the blogosphere, and I don’t like them! One of the things I’ve heard repeatedly (and I don’t know who said it) is “Those who care don’t matter, and those who matter don’t care.” People who like you for what you are don’t care about whether you are a little offensive, people who hate simply don’t matter.
Abby — May 21st, 2010, 5:36 am
Sorry about above, that quote was off. (and it’s from Dr. Seuss): Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind. Next time I’ll check before sending!
Mario Kluser — May 21st, 2010, 7:05 am
Hi Tim,
First off: depending on the educational level of your Dutch audience they will be quiet during your presentation. Most of the time they aren’t dead but polite and showing some respect to the guy on stage. Listening to you was why they came to your presentation in the first place.
Second: I haven’t yet as much haters as you have on-line. However it reminded me immediately on one experience I had when I published a silly video I published on Youtube. In that video I showed people who might what’s in an average tattoo set available on eBay. This was it. I just bought one of these sets and showed what was in it.
I never expected that it would attract some flamers. The first flamer assumed that I was a drug addict and because my Youtube channel, just as my blog, is one of my living rooms I decide who is coming to dinner. My first reaction was to apologize for my accent what was very stupid. Finally I removed the comment.
After a while there was a comment saying ‘You can tell that this guy has no idea what he is talking about’. First I had to laugh because I just was talking about the content of an effing case with a tattoo gun and accessories. This comment was totally insane and had nothing to do with what I was talking about. My first reaction was to react on it and telling the person who left the comment how dumb it was. Giving it a second thought I recognized that this was exactly what that person wanted to achieve. I could vividly imagine that he was leaning back in front of his computer waiting for a reaction where he could react on even more hateful.
I didn’t gave him or anybody else this opportunity and just removed his comment as well and then disabled the comments on this video altogether.
In real life I more than once experienced that people turn into haters at the moment you achieve something with ease that they didn’t. The reason for this is that you are shifting their comfort zone and this isn’t comfortable for them at all. What your achievement tells them is this: ‘Do you see how easy it can be to achieve this? It’s time to get off of your ass and do something.’
Yes, I guess this is what turns people into haters and you gave us some great guidelines here how to deal with it.
Have a great day!
Mario
isabelle — May 21st, 2010, 8:22 am
“I can now proudly say that I have haters not only in English but in about 35 languages, including Dutch”
HAHAHA, really, that crowd must have been the most boring ever.. I laughed loud enough to get the “you’re NOT doing your job”-stare from my soon to be ex-boss.
Really Tim, I think the community should do some love-bombing to compensate. Lots of us, including me, hang around all the time but only post occasionally. I don’t doubt that you lack any thank-you-you-changed-my-life-mails, but count every positive post as x10 or x100 and you get closer to the truth.
Dave — May 21st, 2010, 8:51 am
Melodie Moore > I want to buy from my friends not some guy wearing a nice suit with a frown.<
Love that quote, some guy with a nice suit wearing a frown, too true!
Freddie Smith — May 21st, 2010, 10:03 am
Great video Tim, I think your presentation skills have really improved over time, you looked very comfortable giving that talk especially as the audience seemed to be dead! Just out of curiosity, do you have a list online of events you are speaking at? I’d love to attend one of these kinda events. Thanks once again.
Freddie
Tim Ferriss — May 21st, 2010, 2:04 pm
Thanks very much, Freddie. No real list, as I tend to commit last-minute. Just keep an eye on the blog and Twitter!
Have a great weekend,
Tim
Marcus Santer — May 21st, 2010, 10:34 am
Thanks Tim, just what the doctor ordered.
I’ve recently discovered the ‘downside’ to trying to change the world through promoting something you believe strongly in. I got a couple of nasty e-mails and it really through me off balance. So your video was so helpful because it allowed me to put it into perspective.
Something that a good friend told me a few days ago that also really helped was to make a list of ’20 Reasons Why I Am NOT What ‘They’ Say I Am’ – I’ve made this list and put it on my wall where I can see it regularly.
Thanks again Tim
Marcus
Jason Aiken — May 21st, 2010, 10:37 am
*sigh of relief*
Well put!
Cheers,
Jason Aiken
Ian Davies — May 21st, 2010, 10:45 am
Tim
I am just going to through this out there. Your google ads put up a banner for a hand gun training facility. I am not sure that is a acceptable option for dealing with haters. Just FYI.
Tim Ferriss — May 21st, 2010, 2:00 pm
Hahaha… are you serious? Wow, gotta love this Google AdSense experiment…
JDS — May 21st, 2010, 11:19 am
Reminds me of a post I read recently, I was looking at a product, and ran across a post by the designer of this program, he intentionally baited a well known blogger and bashed the guy for his endorsement of a competing product. Turns out his attack on the blogger drove a lot of people to google his company thereby increasing his page ranking and sales. The more the blogger fought back the more the attacker increased his sales and rankings. Blogger took his bait hook line & sinker. Fighting back with an inferior opponent in the end is a waste of time and can only serve to strengthen the inferior opponent.
Evan — May 21st, 2010, 11:33 am
Tim,
First time, long time ( a.k.a WFAN, N.Y) I am a fan. Nice bolg – your post’s are improving, though that tatoo thing was a bit strange.
Thanks,
Evan
rbonhardt — May 21st, 2010, 1:08 pm
Tim as always thanks for another great post!
I have never understood the concept of haters. You would think it would be a natural tendency for people to promote each other and work together in order to achieve greater effectiveness. However, you post was very accurate and contained some great points.
I have been a closet fan of yours for the past year and have just used all of your principles along with those of people you suggest to put together my first business venture. Thank you for changing my life!
Ryan
Roger Ost — May 21st, 2010, 2:43 pm
Are there good ways to deal with haters on line, like keep their stuff out of search engines or burry their suff in search engines so negative stuff is hard to find?
Jim Sigler — May 21st, 2010, 2:44 pm
Excellent talk.
One of my favorite quotes is from the Dalai Lama: “Our enemies provide us with a precious opportunity to practice patience and love. We should have gratitude toward them.”
You are a better person for dealing with critics and haters constructively. Thanks for writing 4HWW – I look forward to your next book.
Elon Bomani — May 21st, 2010, 3:27 pm
Don’t Hate Participate…..To all the haters, I say with love. What you think about me is none of my business.
Peace in,
Elon
Benny Lewis — May 21st, 2010, 3:38 pm
Excellent video Tim! I’ve been wanting to hear how you deal with haters and trolls – one of your old ones is currently up in arms against me (seriously). He said I’m “as bad as Tim Ferriss”, to which I thanked him of course
Some trolls really are as bad as bullies on a schoolyard – all they want is a reaction. I find that if someone writes a ridiculously long comment that has one tiny mention of something good, I’ll thank them for saying that and the positivity shuts them up quicker than arguing them away ever would.
I wish I had watched this video a few months back. I wasted so much time getting into needless arguments that just had me grinding my teeth wishing horrible things to people. There’s a great XKCD comic strip about angry chatter online that also shows the reason why it happens (number 438 for those curious); I think we end up seeing these words on a screen as nothing more than a faceless force of an opinion against yours and not coming from a human being. The anonymity (even when a name and picture is provided) dehumanises what you end up reading. If we met that same individual in person we’d be much more civil. That’s why I like your rules about people treating one another like in their living rooms.
Now that I’ve said something relevant to the topic, I need to think of a clever way to get you to comment back or to get people mildly interested to click my name and check out my blog. I need the validation to see my numbers go up slightly in Google Analytics. Any ideas?
Oh, I know! I’ll point out some random information that perhaps nobody else missed to show how incredibly observant I am: you need to update the Copyright information at the bottom to 2010!
[OK that was weak - damnit, maybe I need more diet coke too]
B.D. — May 21st, 2010, 4:12 pm
A certain category of hater can be summed up with H.G. Wells’s quote: “Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.”
Griffin Boyce — May 21st, 2010, 4:21 pm
@BD
THAT is a great quote. I will have to use it =)
Chad — May 21st, 2010, 8:38 pm
Awesome post. A couple are well known to me, like “you can’t please all the people all the time”. But a few of them hit hard, like if you are really effective, you will get trash talked a lot. But you know, it really is true.
Michael — May 22nd, 2010, 1:50 am
Keep your hate for what’s important. That’s a good thing to keep in mind.
You don’t have to hate everything.
I ran a test on my blog in an article “Is Tim Ferriss honest ?” and I was amused to see how some people are REALLY against you. I can’t understand it. They simply seem to reject everything they don’t expect (may be that’s even more true for French people).
Anyway, dealing with haters is an essential part of living a well design life whether by working when you want or following unusual tracks.
In fact, if nobody hates you, it might be that you are accomplishing nothing
Richard — May 22nd, 2010, 4:32 am
For me there are different forms of criticism which I take in different ways. If someone disagrees with my point of view and does so in a respectful manner then really I’m fine with it.
On the other hand if someone brands me a scammer, spammer or attacks me personally then I see that as a whole different ball game.
I suppose one of the biggest ways I have grown as a person over the years is having the confidence not to worry too much about the “haters”. As a teenager I hated having to share an opinion incase someone disagreed with me. I didn’t want to stick out from the crowd.
Now, I appreciate that giving your opinion and being true to yourself is vitally important. Whilst you may risk alienating some people you will draw others with similar opinions towards yourself and it is these people who hold the same values as yourself who I believe have the greatest potential to positively impact your lifestyle.
baseline — May 22nd, 2010, 7:34 am
hehehehehehehehehe……….
That was a great “teaser” for the book,sir…well-played! Keep us posted on the dates. Also found the handgun training ad a little strange from a martial artist- adsense can make wrong assumptions, I guess.
Unrelated……… but muse creation (idea generation) is the one area you don’t seem to have a lot of in the archives. Tons of implementation and examples (cold remedy was all-time favorite), but not a lot on how to turn an interest into an idea. Best example is the sound library friend from the book- as a musician, I wouldn’t have contemplated or “found” my way to that idea. I would think about performing, record label, distribution, website that sells gear…. all the traditional stuff. What processes have you found to kickstart the creative process for a muse? I see a lot of questions and comments in these posts about trying to find or start one; might be a popular topic for you. Keep the good stuff coming!
Francisco Alamo — May 22nd, 2010, 9:01 am
Hello Tim,
I´ve heard that you personally read all your commentaries. And as you say in you book, I am trying to get in touch with you as you tell people to do with Bill Clinton for example.
I would apreciate if you send me an email back, It would make me very happy.
Regards from Spain.
Maarten — May 22nd, 2010, 9:31 am
Hi Tim,
De koffie salon. I live five minutes from there, and I go there at least three times a week. The Buscaglione coffee is just brilliant. They now also sell it with a machine (like Nespresso, but better) and it tastes just as great.
I admire the way you are able to find these little secrets every city has. It’s not the place every tourist goes…
Cheers from a sunny Amsterdam.
Tim Ferriss — May 23rd, 2010, 6:46 pm
Thanks, Maarten
Mike Arone — May 22nd, 2010, 10:07 am
HAHAHA! That voice mail was insane….
beside the crazy people like that dude, I feel the majority of “haters” are just jealous of success and equally as scared.
Great video and sick tat man…
Justin — May 22nd, 2010, 10:10 am
This speech is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you so much for your work. You have really enlightened me with this speech. This was my first exposure to your work, and I truly look forward to more.
Kudos, and thank you so much Tim. This really meant a lot.
Stefan — May 22nd, 2010, 12:02 pm
Oh I love the Dutch accents in the Q&A.
Hereby Tim, my excuses for my fellow Dutch-people.
Great talk by the way. You always motivate me!
Yavor — May 22nd, 2010, 12:45 pm
Back from watching the vid…
This is embarrassing…
Amazing how many people (including me) didn’t actually watch the video and fired those comments about the ink job.
Anyway – you got me Tim.
Y.
Karen — May 22nd, 2010, 2:16 pm
Thanks again for an extremely helpful blog/talk. One thing that I have dealt with is allowing myself to become intimidated by Critics/Haters who could be seen as more of an expert on the subjects that I am attempting to present. Again the tips you offered were very helpful.
Thanks
Cosy — May 22nd, 2010, 3:46 pm
@Tim
ppl should troll a bit before they begin to blog, why ? simple there are 2 important things: if the trolled person reply/get any reaction the troll is successful, if dont get any reaction the troll failed
Ghandi for web 2.0
first they ignore you
then they lol at you
then they troll you
then you win
Norman D — May 22nd, 2010, 8:28 pm
Hey Tim,
Another great post…I really like the quality of the videos that you put (both in content and actual picture/sound quality).
My comment is a bit off topic but here it goes. It seems like it’s been a while since you had or talked about a mini-retirement. I mean we know that you went to South Africa for a couple weeks (breaching sharks = bad-ass) and granted you must be hella busy with writing/wrapping-up the upcoming book (can’t wait for that to drop), but I personally liked reading about the trials and epiphanies that you had when you unplugged yourself from the rat-races of conventional society, or whatever you call the daily grind.
Thanks again,
Norman
Toshi O. — May 22nd, 2010, 8:47 pm
Alas, a problem I don’t have.
Think its underrated how you don’t take it personally.
I couldn’t.
Elviz Christ — May 23rd, 2010, 10:35 am
“Don’t rain on my parade because you don’t have one of your own.” – paraphrased quote from Jeff Gitomer
… thus, I embrace this for dealing with haters. Sometimes I will go as far as putting my haters on a pedestal because they can be so damn funny. I’ve posted their hate mail in blogs and posts and it has actually turned into positive traffic. Amazing! …and amusing!
~E. Christ
Erica — May 23rd, 2010, 11:26 am
Hallelulah! Keep on keepin on…
Becky Cortino — May 23rd, 2010, 12:34 pm
Thanks for the reminder to stay on task, Tim — great strategies!
Tito B — May 23rd, 2010, 12:59 pm
Great tips for dealing with this kind of persons. I liked that one of letting them see you happy haha.
Tnx Tim
Becky Cortino — May 23rd, 2010, 2:32 pm
Tim, These “7 Great Principles” resonate with me, though I believe #6 and #7 could be merged, because everyone will likely continue on their own channel.
I believe if you are truly steeped in the ultimate purpose of your mission or work, you don’t have to put on a show, or feel like you’re ‘getting back at someone’ (aka revenge as referred to here)… you just go on being you and doing what you are supposed to do. It’s not about you, anyway… What do you think?
Lydia — May 23rd, 2010, 2:52 pm
Tim,
This is something that everyone, everywhere deals with whether in real life or online. I felt disheartened for the person in the audience who didn’t think that it applied to him and went to such great lengths to try and ask a “meaningful” question. He just didn’t get it.
I am planning on showing this post to my father as he taught me from a young age how to deal with haters. Of course he has his own catch phrases to go with his philosophy including:
“That’s your life, not mine. If you want to be miserable – go right ahead.” (said to a co-worker who was advocating the “need” for my dad to purchase a gas guzzling truck/hating on him for owning a GMC, but good as a general shut down for negativity)
“With friends like that, who needs enemies?” (said to myself and my siblings to encourage us to hang around positive people)
And of course, perhaps his favourite phrase and (oddly enough) one of the most comforting:
“Get over it!”
Usually said to me when I was complaining about anything (haters included). It always made me feel better, because really, who cares!
Of course internet hate is different than real life hate and I can honestly say that I had trouble not reacting when one of my teachers turned to me with a look of disgust and told me “I hate it. I absolutely hate it.” with reference to a project that I had made.
Thank you for putting together this blog! Loved the bit on Cato.
Andrew — May 23rd, 2010, 8:12 pm
Cheers I enjoyed your insight.
Heidi — May 24th, 2010, 3:17 am
Thanks, Tim. This is excellent advice and is about to be posted on my office wall…
Bella — May 24th, 2010, 3:29 am
Wonderful. Thanks. A great reminder that social fabric is not linear, so to even try to be perfect and liked by all is futile. There’s no straight line to being ‘the best’. Great theatrical moment with the sleeve, btw. With every presentation you give, you turn more into a variety and vaudeville performer.
Taps, next time!
Adam Lamotte — May 24th, 2010, 5:49 am
Hi Tim,
This is a great blog post.
I have designed a wikipedia for my work and have been going through the training and also trying to get other people on board so I don’t create a bottleneck (me) with taking care of uploading and maintaining the information. The information needs to be correct so when clients call through they get the correct answer, also with the processing staff they get the right information. I work in finance so quick and correct answers are critical. But, I digress.
A few people have been very negative about the whole thing (haters), they’re a bit old school and like closed systems where no one can change them except key expert dependencies. This is slow and takes a long time, and funding more importantly (bloody expensive). It’s been really hard to deal with up until now.
I now take their negative feedback and have redesign what I’m doing for the better (I haven’t told them though). I can now also look them in the eye and take on board their thoughts and feelings without flinching. Which is a big step for me!!
I really like the direction that this is going, I hope to see other post’s like this.
Best regards
Adam Lamotte
Murlu — May 24th, 2010, 11:44 am
Hater’s gonna hate.
You have to expect people are going to hate you regardless of what you do or how successful you are. So many are ready to build you up and then try to pull you back down – just look how how we deal with celebrities.
It isn’t until you’re dead that they respect you again (cough cough Michael Jackson). So, since you know you’ll always have a group of people that will hate you, let ‘em.
There’s nothing as enjoyable than to troll someone that’s already mad. Push them beyond their own limits while keeping your cool.
Bob — May 24th, 2010, 7:09 pm
Very nice presentation. Looking very fit Mr. Ferriss.
I don’t think the audience can be blamed for being any which way they are, the orator needs to adapt.
On the topics of haters, or maybe more like the general area of the suject, I’m surprised no-one quoted Oscar Wilde, allow me:
“I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their good intellects. A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.”
“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
“When people agree with me I always feel that I must be wrong.”
JB — May 25th, 2010, 12:31 am
Tim: You forgot the most important maxim for dealing with haters:
Most people are idiots.
josh — May 25th, 2010, 12:47 am
HAY Tim i tried to contact through Amy but she said u were
hopefully this works
“i am a long time fan and a first time writer”
and have read your book 15 times at least
now that the corniness is over i was wondering if i could get your input on something, a few seconds of your time could same me years
i will try to keep this as short as possible
i am some what of a Jacque Fresco 2.0′ist in training and i just talked with the Jacque for a couple hours 3 days ago in person and being a self studied multidisciplinary rebel futurist on the high of satori i was wondering
what material could you recommend that could help me to catch up or surpass your level or business and internet wisdom in the most efficient and effective way. I learn fast and i don’t want a degree just the wisdom so i can design and apply it in its parameters which i am unaware of the, “D” is for Definition” so to speak.
p.s. i visited brickwork a month back, lol the guy told me that they get 2 calls a day based on your mention of them in the book and he still hasn’t read it.
p.s. #2 i am 21
p.s. #3 you and Jacque Fresco and people i aspire to surpass
p.s. #3 one of my favorite books is called “The Science Of Enlightenment” worth reading if you haven’t thus far i place it up there along with you book.
(ok this is getting too long)
FINAL p.s. contacting you is hard i feel like the students you described in Princeton but this is not my first attempt and i promise it certainly wont be my last.
All the best
&
I’ll see you when i see you
Ben — May 25th, 2010, 5:57 am
I found the tattoo extremely interesting.
My first impression was, what has this guy done? He is just trying to promote an “extreme” lifestyle by becoming more and more outrageous. And then, because I like your work, I started to justify it, even thinking, you know, I want one of those.
And then, in proper Verfremdungseffekt fashion, you rip the damn thing off your arm. This really snapped me out my preconceived notion(s) and I was kind of embarrassed that I let the image get in the way of the content. I realized I wasn’t paying attention to the message.
I like to think of myself as “enlightened,” but it’s interesting the conclusions one jumps to, without really absorbing the meaning.
Great lesson! Thanks!
7 Practical Tactics for Dealing with Haters — May 25th, 2010, 6:48 am
[...] Tim Ferriss (the famous) entrepreneur, public speaker, and author of The 4-Hour Workweek took the stage at The Next Web ‘10 event in Amsterdam to discuss how to learn to love haters and he shared 7 great principles for dealing with them. see a few bellow : [...]
Oscar — May 25th, 2010, 8:39 am
I usualy don’t like any self help books or any self help promoters as many of them are full of big words, serf serving rules and principles and one giant ego.
I started reading your book few days ago and looked at your blog. I think you are doing pretty well actually! The main reason for this is that I live simillar mini-retirement way for about 7 years already without reading any self-help books and had to do through all those stages as you did by myself.
Funny, I had seen all the things you described, the “If I only have more money” mantra of my friends etc. Just last week I was a bit surprised when my close friend called me lazy. We laughed about it, but it actually surprised me a bit. I organized my life so I don’t have to do the 9-5, I can travel, take months off doing my hobbies etc.. but for some reason people think that this was something that falls on your head while you were motionless and lazy.
BTW: I love the way that you are not trying to put yourself as some deity that does everything right from the start and has some self appointed mandate to preach to others – a common line in the self help promoter group. You really can’t get from point A to C without going through B, but it is better if you are guided and assured that the path is correct.
Anyway, good luck to you and for others – those points you talk about are valid – I live by them and come to this state on my own, and it is good to see that I am not alone and there are people who can actually formulate their thoughts pretty clearly. (Something I still need to learn)
heuristic — May 25th, 2010, 12:58 pm
They laughed at Galileo! They laughed at Einstein!
Yes, and they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
Brandon Breshears — May 25th, 2010, 5:38 pm
I loved the post! I take responses way too personal. I have seen everything been called a scam. I think that is a way to know that you’ve made it, especially as an info marketer is when you get people getting angry at you for no logical reason. Angry people make angry and hateful comments its that simple!
Jaime — May 25th, 2010, 5:52 pm
I love how people can even hate on someone like yourself who does nothing but help people to enhance their lives on a large scale and in many different ways. Sure you make money along the way. It’s America. Sure you enjoy center stage. So what? That’s the only way to be effective on a large scale.
If your happy and people respect you, someone will be jeolous enough to spend time trying to tear you down. It really is a sign that you are growing in popularity.
As for jealousy, when people (you, me, us, whoever) feel it they should look inside themselves and find where they are cheating themselves out of something in life.
I personally love to have somebody like yourself to give me tips in things that really matter in my life or that I just enjoy. It’s fun to learn or to try to figure out tricks to be more effective.
Tim Ferriss — May 29th, 2010, 10:58 am
Thank you, Jaime, and everyone who’s kind enough to comment and help this community. I love it.
anna harper — May 26th, 2010, 9:26 am
Hey Tim, I apologise for not writing this sooner. Bought the first book and the second, why..it changed my life. I am not a young nerd, far from it, can barely text, ..with the recession had to do some fast moves, resulted in some success, 30% increase in pay to start, then built up cred.,next got headhunted to do a job I was not anywhere near capable of doing, OUTSOURCED! never even heard of it before 4HWW my income went through the roof, 10X original salary on one hour work per day! Now in Holland, really sorry I did not hear you were in Amsterdam. It has changed not only my income, also my self worth and resilience to change, and, I insist all my feng shui clients read it…and at my other job…they love the quality of (OUTSOURCED) work I bring to the table and then bill them for. Thank you Anna
Tim Ferriss — May 29th, 2010, 11:09 am
That’s outstanding, Anna! Congratulations. This made my day
Tim
thomas — May 26th, 2010, 10:23 am
Hi Tim,
Many thanks for all you do here and elsewhere! I am not a hater! Tips are cool but address one’s reaction to the hater(absolutely important, control what you can control)but don’t really speak to the issue of how to handle a real hater in the sense of a stalker or other adversary in the social media realm or out here in the street.
I favor the basic Aikido/Ju-Jitsu approach: redirection and using opponents energy to reach a higher place. If someone is trying to kill me literally I am a big believer in the S.P.E.A.R. system of Tony Blauer. It works off trying to use basic flinch mechanism to ensure survival before going into complex motor skills.
anyway, Thanks!
jim — May 26th, 2010, 12:51 pm
The fake tattoo thing was funny, I didn’t think you had any tattoos after all those episodes of Random but you did take a long trip to China!
Tony Hernandez — May 26th, 2010, 9:52 pm
**Moderator please disregard the first post, wrong e-mail**
Tim,
As we await your new book, I do have one suggestion, more like request, for your new book. If not your book then maybe it’s something you can touch on in a later post. A lot of your success is due to, I believe, your ability to deconstruct things. Will you be covering this?
Everything from how learning how to throw a knife, beat depression, manage time, to learning how to play guitar can be learned if one is to take into account others trial-and-error’s, find what worked and didn’t and then execute.
You can write an encyclopedia on how you lifehacked this and lifehacked that. What we (me I mean) needs are those fundamental tools and resources to be able to deconstruct and hack things that we need and would like to learn. Right now, you build specific tools to guide people to do bigger and better things. What is you showed us how to be tool makers. Now that is a case study I would love to see.
An army of Tim’s. Albiet, without as much caffeine.
–Tony
Post Script
This same message is being e-mailed, Twitted (new word I just made up) and facebooked (I need to call Webster’s) to you. If you want to roll a 7, throw more die.
Tim Ferriss — May 29th, 2010, 10:55 am
Tony, thanks for the comment. Heard loud and clear. There’s a good chance I’ll tackle this as my next project. Thanks again!
Tim
Paul — May 27th, 2010, 2:08 am
Valid points, taken, though still trying to figure how you do it, having a lot of fun whilst often saying usefull stuff, and on the other hand only having yourself as a product. Detaching Tim Ferriss from his ideas still puzzle me, but you seem to go along fine. No problem, very clever. Keep up the good work!
Paul — May 27th, 2010, 2:20 am
Tim, after thinking it all through, just decided to go on another heliskiing trip in BC coming season! Do care ’bout the environment, especially when its 3 meters of powder glinstering down at me from a chopper ready to be attacked. Amen, and the world will not worsen absent of my useful thoughts for a week or so.
Sheryl Blystone — May 27th, 2010, 5:34 pm
Excellent! This is applicable to practically ALL facets of life. I always learn from you; thank you.
Maria — May 27th, 2010, 10:36 pm
Wish I had you telling me this about 10 years ago when I published my first book and immediately received a review which was nothing more than a horrific personal attack. At the time, I thought it best to not even honor it with a response, but when I read it, I felt like someone had physically kicked me in the stomach. As a result, I backed away from media exposure and the inevitable haters that come along with it.
I’m older, wiser, and way tougher now, so I’m making a comeback. It was great to reinforce that everyone experiences haters and trolls at some point. It’s just part of the business.
I love your teachings and philosophy on enjoying more of life. Keep up the good work.
Maria
Chris Carter — May 28th, 2010, 5:20 am
Hi Tim,
Great post. Great video. I really enjoyed it.
Plenty of advice to take away and put into action. I especially like the 80/20 Pareto’s Law flavour of the whole ‘building your online community’. That Pareto’s Law is everywhere! It just makes sense to focus on quality for long term growth, not quantity. You put it so well in your presentation. Very timely for me and my budding website in so many ways. Thank you.
Cheers from Australia,
Chris
p.s. If you’re ever over here and you want to see some of this beautiful country by mountain bike between speaking engagements, let me know. Damn it! Pareto’s Law is even in mountain biking…
Mike Hatchell — May 28th, 2010, 7:01 am
Hello Tim
Just wanted to say that your book was a revelation. In part it revealed that I’m well on my way to automating my job without actually having it as my strategy. Now that I’m focused, look out! I “work” about two days a week now, and the rest of the time I spend looking for ways to maximize my cash flow. I have yet to figure out how to get my VA to fly to appointments and close deals, so I consider the flying and the hotels as the “work” part of the job. Minimizing email pain has been a big benefit to reading your advice. I’m not sure that any real problem has ever been solved by exchanging emails.
With all that said… Here’s my question:
Right now I’m looking for my niche (the hard part), I’m learning Weebly, I’m all over evernote, I’m about to put my VA on his/her first significant task to help free up time in my main career. What else would you do, or what would you do next? That’s the question. Can’t thank you enough.
Mike
Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.
Party On,
Mike
Tim Ferriss — May 29th, 2010, 10:51 am
Congrats! My suggestion: read “The Effective Executive” by Peter Drucker.
Peter Nakashian — May 28th, 2010, 7:17 am
Duane Allman’s personal philosophy of life was very simple and basic. He once said, “Everything’s the same everywhere. There are nice folks, and ass-holes, and you have to learn to distinguish between the two in order to get by. And someone who’s an ass-hole to somebody may be a nice folk to somebody else, so you’ve got to learn to be nice to everybody, and show everybody respect, that’s the only way people respect you. You’ve got to have mutual respect and a little bit of love, if you can round it up. And don’t be afraid to share what’s inside of you with other people. That’s the only way you’re ever going to get free or have any fun all, either. So just rock on, and have you a good time. If I have a choice between having a good time and a shitty time, I’m going to have me a good time. I’ve had enough shitty times.”
Miguel — May 28th, 2010, 11:12 am
Hey Tim,
Excellent advice, but if you don’t mind, I have some constructive criticism. When you look at your advice on the surface, you seem to come off as quite innocent, and these comments reflect that. The problem I see here is the fact that you presented these in the first place. Although you don’t share their names, the fact that you tell these stories is really just another way at revenge. In other words, you are performing the act of hating yourself. The difference here is that you are being passive-agressive.
Now the methods that these haters use in order to confront you about a problem they have is very immature and infantile, not to mention ineffective in your case. You also have a problem with haters, that’s why you presented these ideas, but just because you take a pleasant and upbeat approach to it does not mean you are any different from them. In other words, you respond by hating passively while they hate actively. Both you and the haters do not attempt to solve the actual problem.
The problem may be a simple misunderstanding or it may be a complete clash of ideologies. Of course you couldn’t possibly respond to every form of criticism out there, and that’s why it makes sense to ignore those that don’t articulate their problem to you in a non-threatening and constructive manner. That being said, I would like to present something to you that should really take a look at.
I read your book and I really liked it. But over the past few years, my understanding of the world has changed a lot. I used to agree with you on the service section about changing one person’s life is all you need to do. The problem I now have with service in the way that you talk about and advocate is that you, once again, approach these problems from single reactive stand point. To make it simpler, you see that certain kids in Vietnam don’t have access to education, so you build a school. You approach the problem reactively and feel that that is all that is needed to become a “good” person. This is like continually giving people cold medication without ever considering why they got a cold in the first place. It is patchwork. Putting a bandaid on a tumor does not get rid of the tumor itself. It’s like if you were to stand up and tell everyone to stop being racist but you completely ignore the source of racism itself. What I’m trying to say is that, although you are very sincere, you’re not actually solving any problems.
You’re probably well aware that the system you preach in the 4HWW is completely unsustainable. The Earth is a closed system, you can’t just have everyone outsource and automate income because the whole infrastructure would collapse. There is some good coming out of your book though, and that is that people don’t want to work. Why would we do a repetitive task when a machine can (or in your system, another human) do it better? Well, it frees us to do bigger and better things.
What I am talking about is The Venus Project. The Venus Project is an actual attempt solve all the world’s problems by restructuring society as a whole. In fact, I can’t believe you haven’s stumbled upon this. The goal is to automate AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE in order to free ALL humans. This is the 4HWW applied intelligently to social design. You’ll find that by producing abundance of all the necessities of life, 90% of all crime will suddenly disappear. In your book you talk about cause snobs. Well, guess what, they are ALL important. Save the whales, save the children, save the Earth. If you attack each one individually, nothing changes. It time to “tear apart conventional assumptions” about social problems and actually work towards a solution.
Why am I telling this to you? Well 1) you are in a position of influence 2) you have the intellectual capacity to understand all of these concepts 3) I’m a big fan of you and know you can change, just like I did.
It is important to note that you should not let your ego affect any of this. Ego is the act of desperately clinging on to an idea that is obsolete. Ego prevents progress. I am not here to prove you wrong or to “win.” I want learn and find the truth. If you actually start channelling your energy into the venus project, you will be working towards real change. You will also be the first celebrity to support this idea. The others don’t support it simply because they don’t actually want to solve problems or give up their status as celebrities. I hope that is not the case with you.
http://www.thevenusproject.com explore and read all the information there. Also watch Zeitgeist: Addendum in google video. It introduces the venus project as a viable solution.
Thank you for your time,
Miguel
Geoff — May 28th, 2013, 1:32 am
I think you have forgotten one single item of importance….human nature.
Tim and many other 4HLers (4 Hour Lifestylers) live in the real world. The real world, where people live off benefits, sell drugs, commit crime, fail eduction, and the alike. In the real world there is corruption, organised crime (Tim knows this after a stint with starting up a gym in the far east), religious wars, and the alike.
Your Venus Project SOUNDS great, but it’s basically communism, which has been proved time and again…..doesn’t work.
As a mental exercise, or even on a small scale with the right people, your theory is brilliant. But in this, the REAL WORLD, you’re just barking like a mad dog.
Tim focussed on what’s effective, efficient, and works. A car that works is much more useful than imagining your car could fly, shoot laser beams, and wear a big red cape.
Kenneth — May 28th, 2010, 12:01 pm
I always thought the deferred plan was suspicious and did not feel quite right, but you have articulated the whole thing beautifully.
You dropped somewhat of a bombshell at the end of this presentation, without much room for comment. You said that you would not blog for ads in any case.
I have a website that is using solely ads and affiliate marketing to get off the ground, and to test an ebook when traffic builds. I know this does not fit your book exactly, where I should test the ebook first with Adwords. It seems I am learning the hard way, and in fact I have been meaning to ask you your thoughts on Adsense, affiliate programs, and other monetization models for content.
Is this not a viable alternative to selling a product outright? I am guessing the answer is no, but wanted to hear it from you. I am also guessing that more than 20% of your readers are trying to monetize this way since it is so prevalent, but not necessarily correct.
Tim Ferriss — May 29th, 2010, 10:49 am
Hi Kenneth,
If you can make it work and do so ethically, go for it! No need to limit yourself to products.
Tim
Dan — May 28th, 2010, 1:14 pm
I thought it was interesting that so few people raised their hands when asked if they had ever dealt with haters. Haters are EVERYWHERE, not just online. (Although the internet does tend to bring them out in droves). And I don’t think they’re limited to the people who come right out and insult you. A lot of times the most dangerous ones are the people who pretend to be your friend, but secretly can’t stand to see you succeed.
Haters are every cynic out there who would rather tear down someone else’s work than build something of their own. So if the people in that audience have truly never dealt with a hater of any kind, they clearly need to get out more
Thanks for the post, Tim.
Marco Díaz Calleja — May 28th, 2010, 5:44 pm
I just want to see the haters do their thing in this post.
Just kidding! Great recommendations as always Tim; even better tattoo.
Scott Dinsmore — May 29th, 2010, 8:01 am
Right on Tim. So it sounds like a decent judge of success is how many people disapprove…actually that might end badly. But you know what I mean. Focusing on your 1000 core fans sounds very 80/20. Just finished reviewing that book by the way and had a fun chat with Richard Koch out in El Algarve, Portugal. I felt like I was having the same epiphanies as you did a few years back! I loved it.
So when are you going to compile your best pieces of negative press for us? Thanks for sharing some so far.
Happy exploring,
Scott
KristinStegeman — May 29th, 2010, 9:36 am
Great Article. So good to be reminded to always move towards what you set out to do with conviction despite skeptics and people who are waiting for you to fail. It reminds us that our inner voice should guide our path always and stand strong in the midst of the chaos created in the world around us.
Thanks for all your ideas on lifestyle design. People like me in the health
care industry could definitely take notes/action.
Take care.
Maarten — May 30th, 2010, 4:04 am
Hi Anna,
That’s awesome! And welcome to Amsterdam. I haven’t outsourced any work yet. Maybe it’s because I’m afraid that work in Dutch is harder to outsource than English work. But I should give it a try.
So far i’ve managed to become self-employed as a consultant. I now work 2 days – not mobile, but in the clients office – and it pays me the same as the 40 our workweek I had when I was a corporate slave.
The last few weeks i spent most of my spare time reading and studying stuff, to increase my value as a consultant. It’s what I enjoy doing, so that’s okay. The upcoming months I will use my spare time to think and design some extra cashflows. That will be exciting too.
heuristic — May 30th, 2010, 11:55 am
The whole thrust of both the video and the comments is a backhanded, ad hominem treatment of anyone who says nasty things about you. But surely if someone says “you’re a scammer” and there’s absolutely no truth to it then wouldn’t it be more productive to refute the claim point by point rather than just diss them as envious?
Dan — May 30th, 2010, 12:43 pm
Heuristic -
I look at the post more as a practical guide to dealing with everything from legit critics to crazy people. (And how to overcome discouragement in your own life that could result from dealing with them.) Surely there are times when the best answer is to simply refute a false claim point by point. (Like for the argument “you’re a scammer”). But like Tim mentioned in the video, other times the best answer is to simply ignore it rather than “pour gasoline on the fire” by responding to it. It all depends on the nature of the claim, the source from which it came, etc.
I wish the Internet was a place where sensational accusations could be put to bed with pure logic, but I think you and I both know that it’s not always the case! How do you logically refute the argument “(your name here) is the Antichrist!”?
Debbie — May 30th, 2010, 2:53 pm
This was just the kind of talk I needed, I’ve been really successful lately (not saying to brag) with my own automated businesses and the more I get this success the more I start to get emails from people really getting offended about, well, really small things they blow up to enormous problems. I was really upset about these at the beginning, but as you say, focus on the people who do get it and spend your time on these, it will be much more fulfilling in the end. I’m 22 and when I tell people how I make my money, they don’t even believe it and just assume I’m making it up. That’s a good sign I think. If it’s too good to be true, than I’m really on a roll
Hoped you enjoyed our country and will visit soon again.
Thanks for the post,
Debbie
*KEG* — May 30th, 2010, 8:24 pm
Thank you Tim!
This is awesome! I make it a policy to NEVER personally reply to the haters that post acid comments on my music/videos. The funny thing is, those trash-talkin haters actually INCREASE the bond between you and your fans! Tim is a ROCK STAR!
Master Dayton — May 30th, 2010, 8:33 pm
Great post. It surprised me how many people are standing in line just waiting to trash anyone who tries to help other people out. You’re right that you just need to be able to concentrate on the positive people whose lives you do change for the better, though being tactical in response to negativity at the right time can make a huge difference.
Jeffro — May 30th, 2010, 10:49 pm
Great post.
Got me with the tattoo. I hate to say I was rolling my eyes saying oh no he had fell for the everyman’s fashion…
But then you caught me as a hater.
Time to read some stoic lit.
Good video,
Jeff
josh — May 31st, 2010, 12:47 am
Hi Tim i tried to contact through Amy but she said u were
hopefully this works
“i am a long time fan and a first time writer”
and have read your book 15 times at least
now that the corniness is over i was wondering if i could get your input on something, a few seconds of your time could same me years
i will try to keep this as short as possible
i am some what of a Jacque Fresco 2.0?ist in training and i just talked with the Jacque for a couple hours 3 days ago in person and being a self studied multidisciplinary rebel futurist on the high of satori i was wondering
what material could you recommend that could help me to catch up or surpass your level or business and internet wisdom in the most efficient and effective way. I learn fast and i don’t want a degree just the wisdom so i can design and apply it in its parameters which i am unaware of the, “D” is for Definition” so to speak.
p.s. i visited brickwork a month back, lol the guy told me that they get 2 calls a day based on your mention of them in the book and he still hasn’t read it.
p.s. #2 i am 21
p.s. #3 you and Jacque Fresco and people i aspire to surpass
p.s. #3 one of my favorite books is called “The Science Of Enlightenment” worth reading if you haven’t thus far i place it up there along with you book.
(ok this is getting too long)
FINAL p.s. contacting you is hard i feel like the students you described in Princeton but this is not my first attempt and i promise it certainly wont be my last.
All the best
&
I’ll see you when i see you
heuristic — May 31st, 2010, 9:43 am
@Dan “And how to overcome discouragement in your own life that could result from dealing with them.”
Well Dan, that’s really easy for me. I don’t give a flying [bleep] what anyone thinks.
Dan — May 31st, 2010, 1:53 pm
@heuristic
lol I see…
That would be a handy skill to have sometimes. I usually err on the other side of things, trying to please everyone all the time. That’s why a post like this is useful to me – so when negative comments or press DO come, I won’t be phased as much by it.
Tab Artis — May 31st, 2010, 9:03 pm
Great post Tim. It made me reflect upon a quote that has given me comfort and power through the years:
“The man who really counts in this world is the doer, not the mere critic – the man who actually does the work, even if roughly and imperfectly, not the man who talks or writes about how it ought to be done.”
– Teddy Roosevelt
Keep up the good work.
Brandon Paquet — May 31st, 2010, 9:12 pm
Hey Tim,
I love your book and I am currently reading the second edition! I am involved in network marketing and I am constantly dealing with the haters and critics. “Those things never work, thats a pyramid, I tried one of those things before, Good Luck, I hope it works out for you.” I have heard it all but you know what I normally just agree instead of becoming defensive because it gets you no where. Jim Rohn tells the story of reaping and sewing. If you have great seed you have to just keep planting it. The birds will always get some, but you can’t chase the birds because it takes you away from planting the seed! Building wealth is really hard work, if it wasn’t, more people would be rich. Focus on what really matters and forget about the rest. Great article! I am going to use it at my next training.
Brandon
David Elcoate — May 31st, 2010, 11:32 pm
Tim,
I love the post, especially about if you’re doing your job well then 95% of the people will dislike you. Saw a quote recently that was similar to this that said: “When you’re on the field, the opposition only want to tackle the one with the ball!”
Keep running with the ball Tim.
Zach Even - Esh — June 1st, 2010, 6:42 am
Tim – yo bro, GREAT stuff brutha, very much looking forward to your next book, and, on the note of THIS Blog Post, it is NOW, a few years after rdng 4 Hr Work Week, that my lifestyle design has REALLY come into play.
I wanna thank you, dude, b/c it was a long road but damn dude, sh*t is going awesome now
Keep Kickin ass, psyched for the new book!
–z–
Patty Ayers — June 1st, 2010, 12:18 pm
I’m not a hater – but have you actually *read* #2 above? The sentences make no sense together at all. Maybe English isn’t the first language of the person who wrote it?
Keyou Aka — June 1st, 2010, 12:24 pm
I really enjoyed this piece Tim, now I have to get to reading all the comments!
Thank you.
Ryan — June 1st, 2010, 2:05 pm
Hey Tim,
So I have noticed that you reply to a fair few comments on your blog. I am both impressed and perplexed. Do you really take the time out of your day to see what people are saying and reply? Or, do you have some sort of clever automated bot system that finds comments that might catch your fancy based on certain criteria and sends them to you. I am just trying to figure out how you do it because there are a lot of comments.
Cheers!
Tim Ferriss — June 5th, 2010, 6:48 pm
Hi Ryan,
I actually enjoy reading my comments, so it’s me. No auto-magic going on. This is why comments can often sit in moderation for a while. Going through comments doesn’t actually take long, as I have my process down.
Tim
Matt Gartland — June 1st, 2010, 4:04 pm
An unrelated question to this article, but I’ve been biting my tongue on it for a while so I just have to ask…
I’ve seen your name misspelled constantly and consistently throughout the Interwebs (“Ferris”). Given your Jedi-mind tricks for combating haters, how much does this seemingly obviously gaffe boil your skin? No, really?
And for context, my last name is habitually butchered too – Gartland. The “T” gets no love, ever. Instead, I’m relegated to chintzy Christmas tinsel. I love American vernacular!
Cheers!
Matt
Tim Ferriss — June 5th, 2010, 6:47 pm
Hahaha… I’m used to the “Ferris” mistake. Doesn’t bother at this point unless it’s a good friend. They still screw it up sometimes.
Tim
shannon — June 1st, 2010, 9:55 pm
im sorry, maybe its because im blonde, but i just dont get it, tim ferriss has haters?
i only see everything to love, whats wrong with you people?
Alex Posicionamiento — June 2nd, 2010, 8:41 am
This a very educational and inspiring article. Bloggers and article writers should learn how to express their writings this way so that their content would be really useful. Anyway, regarding scamming and all kinds of fraud, this content is very useful and straight to the point. Online workers and bloggers should apply this because it will be very useful.
Thank you very much!
Alex
Jan — June 2nd, 2010, 9:14 am
Hi Tim,
I never read one of your books before. It’s the first time I have encountered your blog and I’m afraid that I like it.
I guess, I will buy “The four-hour Workweek”. It seems to be a good DEAL
.
How many languages do you speak?
Jan
P.S.:
“Mitleid bekommt man umsonst, Neid muss man sich verdienen” (Robert Lembke)
Chris Chong — June 2nd, 2010, 9:40 am
Tim, I really enjoy your strategies on life. I have been reading the Less Is More book and am really diggin it.
Eric Spett — June 2nd, 2010, 11:07 am
Hey Tim,
Great post (and video) as always.
Try Googling your name: “Tim Ferriss” or “Timothy Ferriss”. Check out the sponsored results.
-Eric
George Resch — June 2nd, 2010, 11:50 am
When you are good at something, especially if it’s something that requires taking some sort of action, people are reminded of how inadequate their effort has been. They have to look at (but not address) how mediocre their life is turning out, not because of bad luck, but because of how unwilling they are to take responsibility for their own life. Entitlement in this day and age and for our generation has become an epidemic. I am thankful for this book for not only helping me think outside the box, but for making my “box” that much bigger, making it that much harder to think outside of it.
Nathan — June 2nd, 2010, 2:15 pm
Tim,
Thank you for analyzing and breaking down this topic and including actionable steps. I find myself being lazy with issues like this and more likely to either avoid dealing with them or to allow them to be an excuse not to do things that I know (or feel) I should do. Your efforts remind me to approach things that I otherwise wouldn’t in a more analytical and mindful way and to have the courage not to despair and give up.
…and yes, I know that sounds like a corny, pre-packaged, infomercial comment haha but it is the truth.
brooks Hanes — June 3rd, 2010, 1:35 pm
Haterade, anyone? Honestly, some of us love to be hated, Tim, and I am sure you love to take advantage of it. I will keep following you as long as you are a victim of haterade-over-the-head like the winning football coach. [here's some loving haterade: your site copyright at bottom right should now be 2007-2010]
Vic Dorfman — June 3rd, 2010, 7:57 pm
Dating coach Brent Smith (of David DeAngelo’s DVD’s fame) turned me on to “The Sedona Method” by Hale Dwoskin.
It’s all about “releasing” (‘course it’s slightly more involved than that!).
Immediately applicable and practical self-improvement; 2nd Best self-help book I’ve read in ages!
NATURALLY.. the 1st is the 4HWW.
richard allen » facebook exists — June 4th, 2010, 5:28 am
[...] we can welcome it as an experience to grow and have a conversation in rather than hiding from the haters. In 2007, Mark Clague posted a group for discussion on using facebook in educational circles and [...]
Ian — June 4th, 2010, 11:37 am
Hey Tim – Don’t know if you’re still in Turkey – And I don’t know if you’ll get this – But there are a few key places in Istanbul that you shouldn’t miss. Before you leave Turkey, I’d love to share a few gems with you – and talk about the Turkish language! Peace, Ian
CRD — June 5th, 2010, 12:19 am
Hi Tim,
Another great article. Thanks.
I’m sorry this is a bit off topic. But it relates to a previous post of yours about holding your breath.
You-Tube video of world champion freediver – Guillaumenery Nery, free diving at Deans Blue hole. The Deepest blue hole in the world.
Pretty awesome. I think you will like it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQITWbAaDx0
Sysy Morales — June 5th, 2010, 9:15 am
Tim! This post made me so happy I could cry! It reminded me a lot of what I heard John McAfee (founder of McAfee) say at a college graduation speech a few years ago. Great minds do think alike.
And how is it you pull the most appropriate quotes out of your hat like that?
Thanks a lot for a great post and for reminding all of us to focus and ignore the naysayers.
I’m going to go lay down on the street now…
Love Danielson — June 5th, 2010, 2:16 pm
Hey,
i just wanted to ask because on some level i feel a sympathy towards haters and feel leaving them off isn’t good enough, that it’s not doing anything towards them personally, that i need to teach them to stop hating or they will keep going.
i would wish though to influence them yet it’s so so so hard to change opinion without it being seen as forced upon.
i know this seems like a question to be debated through faith/philosophy but what’s your insight or own thought (personal answer) on should i follow and help these haters or do you think it’s a waste?
Corey — June 5th, 2010, 4:06 pm
Tim,
My sincere thanks for this post and video. With the plethora of info on the web, it’s rare when information hits you at the exact right time. In this case, it did. As a first time author, I, too, have felt the wounds those 1-star reviews can have on your mental state. And worse, I let that acid suck the energy from me that should have been spent on the people the book has helped. A battle that I’m continuing to work through but hearing your experience has truly given me a clearer outlook.
Keep up the great work brother,
corey
Lara Jane — June 5th, 2010, 6:25 pm
So true! Luckily I don’t have too many haters, but there are definitely a few who struggle to understand the Ultimate Lifestyle philosophy of living and continuously try to reinforce the current status quo. Bless them!
Paul Dennis — June 5th, 2010, 11:20 pm
Hey Tim,
Great message, and something everyone can identify with. Even if someone doesn’t have their own blog, if they’ve spent a few days on the internet, they’ve almost certainly come across a troll.
Your message reminds me of a Joe Polish genius interview with Ryan Lee. I think it was Ryan who said he was told by a very successful marketer that he’d much rather have 50% of people love him and 50% of people hate his guts than having 100% of people just think he’s OK. Ryan went on to tell a story about when he was on a plane once, and this mother of 2 small children was sitting a few seats behind them. She asked the man sitting next to them if he would switch with her so that she could be with her kids. He looked back, and said “No, I don’t want to sit in the middle seat”. Ryan told the guy that he would switch with the man, and then switch with the mom, so that she could be with her kids. He felt great about what he did, and posted it on his blog. He definitely had a lot of good responses, but one lady wrote him an email basically bitching him out for being sexist and degrading her by not letting her deal with it herself. I think in Ryan’s words he said you’d have thought he killed one of her family members it was so bad.
The point he wanted to make was that no matter how good you believe the things you are doing are, there will always be someone out there who won’t agree with you.
Thanks again, great video! (By the way, loved your interview with Joe Polish as well!)
Thanks,
Paul
Charlie — June 6th, 2010, 9:28 pm
Tim, This past weekend I did something I have never done before. I swam in a 2.4 mile open water swim competition in Charleston, SC. Prior to this past weekend, I had swum (swam?) in open water only once before. I had trained in a pool up to a mile. I swam with my best friend and we finished within a minute of each other. My wife and two year old daughter were there to meet me at the finish. Not a bad way to start the our eleventh wedding anniversary. A year ago I would have thought I could not possibly have completed such a swim. Thanks to Total Immersion (when it comes to swimming) and your inspiration, I am really excited to find out what other things I can do that I never thought I could. This will be an amazing year.
Tim Ferriss — June 8th, 2010, 9:48 am
Congratulations, Charlie! That is a huge accomplishment!
Tim
Nazare — June 7th, 2010, 3:48 am
Absolutely brilliant!!!
It’s all about me and my whole life being just myself, standing up for what is right and not being accepted by most of “others”. Unfortunately I didn’t make the best of it and it brought me sorrows.
Experiments in Lifestyle Design: Internet Business from Rural Japan | Darren L Carter — June 7th, 2010, 5:58 am
[...] than a year ago but I never focused on all the stuff about lifestyle design (his blog is even named Experiments in Lifestyle Design). For me lifestyle design was something I was already doing. I was (still am) living in a tiny [...]
Alice — June 7th, 2010, 8:30 pm
Hi Tim,
I am new to internet marketing, just having started in January of this year. One of the first resources that I was introduced to was your book. I took it and found it a fascinating read! Thanks for your efforts in giving us this great book, I realize that publishing time consuming and a difficult field. I am glad that someone took the chance to publish it! I found that the lifestyle that you outlined in the book was just what I was looking to achieve but had never hear of anyone having these ideas in print before getting the copy of “The 4 Hour Workweek”.
I just watched your video on how to deal with “haters”. Being new in the IM world my blog has not generated any harsh critics but I am sure that one day someone will post something negative and I will know now how to deal with it from the advice that you just given.
Thanks for all your help and advice. I will visit your blog often!
All the best to you,
Alice
Spyridon A. Adam — June 8th, 2010, 5:01 am
Hallo there,
first of all really nice job man. It’s my first comment ever and I’d like to take the opportunity and congratulate you for your book, your blog, but most of all for the way you stand in life.
Although I never left any hate-mail / voice mail / any other hate-communication to you, I was a “hater”. Meaning that the first time I read your book, I really wanted to punch you… But anyways, later on I realized that was just my mental horizons broadening and maybe it hit on my nerves a little bit. (the punching thing left out of my mind though)
I admit I still haven’t managed to see your point of you in everything you write or say. And that’s why I need an opinion on something (everybody else is welcome to comment on this guys, I really need third party opinions) –
I’m posting to solve a problem of mine (yeah, yeah, I’m an altruist). I understand this might seem a very “baby problem” to everyone, but to me it’s like having a mountain on my chest!!
So, unlike Tim suggests, I work a lot of hours in a day. Only, I don’t see it like that (work). I do like my lifestyle. I do like what I’m studying right now, and I can’t imagine waking up one day and not do what I do now – that is reading books about penal theory and studying music (well That has been stalled for a couple of months, but what the heq? I’ll be back)
Being in the midst of my studies I am through major critical workload at least three to four times a year. I enjoy it because I really learn a lot about things I always wanted, and sometimes I feel grateful for things that I get to read and people I get to meet.
Doing mostly what I adore, I don’t mind about what other people think of that. But that does not go to ALL people. There are people I adore and love and respect in my life. Now, here’s my question:
How do you treat a person close to you, I mean really close to you, when he/she doesn’t get it? When you have real hard evidence of their love (like funding your undesirable activities -and not being rich-) how do you treat them?
Is a person close to me to be treated like a Hater?
Is a person close to me to be treated like he/she just doesn’t get it?
For the most part, that’s what these persons (now, I got a lot of these in my environment – just for the record – yeah, this is breaking rule number 1 guys, I know) behave like lately.
Constant diminishing and criticism not only (and not always) for what I do, but for who I am or how I behave, at times I most need my piece of mind (examns, papers, presentations).
Little things can become living hell. Like I don’t pick up the phone at once or if I get really excited about something they don’t like/understand and boom: you got their contempt and anger.
Like I said, it usually doesn’t get into me, but spending a lot of hours indoors has a major effect: I get to see the same people over and over again. I do try to get out and meet new people, and I succeed, but generally there are always a couple of people that are really close to me and I love them the last couple of years. So, being around THEIR negative energy makes me reactive, emotionally and really messes up my psychology.
I don’t know if the above make any sense at all, but I’m in a dead-end. The reason I need third party opinions here, is that I’m so emotionally invested in the persons around me, that I can’t seem to get a clear view on how and where to categorize them, so I could immediately know how to treat them!
Hell, I don’t even know if the problem is in my behavior or in theirs!
So, if anybody (especially Tim!) has any idea on how to work this problem out, keep posting! Anything actionable and understandable (from the viewpoint of a 5year old) will do
Thank you for your time.
Tim Ferriss — June 8th, 2010, 9:47 am
Thanks for the comment, Spyridon. Just my quick thoughts: even if they do certain things that seem to reflect love (financing your projects), if they are directing anger and contempt at you for little things (or unreasonably and often), they do not truly love you for who you are. Since you are the average of the 5 or so people you associate with most, I would suggest you need to find a new peer group to replace these people. Simple — and as gut-wrenchingly hard, often — as that.
Hope that helps!
Tim
AJ — June 8th, 2010, 8:24 am
Too much time is given to the snipers of this world- too quick to shatter dreams and share disillusion.
My Fiancée and I both experienced it when we got engaged.
Getting engaged at 22 conjures up all manner of responses- from the pleased-as-punch golly goshes of friends to the somber warnings from the second wives and newly divorced.
We amassed a (very) small fortune last year (penny pinching here, robbing Peter to pay Paul there) but found the merry-go-round of Wedding Fayres and extravagant hotel reception conveyor belts leaching our funds and our romance. Instead, we bought round-the-world tickets (an early honeymoon, if you like) and saw places we’d only ever dreamed of and felt alive and young and free.
We have decided that when we do get hitched it will be an impromptu, haphazard affair of our favourite things (pakoras and tinned fruit salad next to a hog roast and champagne) with no critics of pessimists allowed- too much time is given to the snipers of this world- too quick to shatter dreams and share disillusion. But for those in love, looking, or hopeful- a glass of champagne will be waiting for you.
AJ
Yadgyu — June 8th, 2010, 7:00 pm
I would like to ask a sort of crazy question here: When does it make sense to
use violence to silence a hater?
This may not mean killing a person. It might just mean threatening a person, grabbing a person by the collar, or smacking a person.
I think sometimes that ignoring a person may not be enough. Sometimes the only way to get certain people to restrain themselves is for you to restrain them. Violence should not be underestimated.
Arjan — June 8th, 2010, 11:44 pm
Hi Tim, readers, haters
I’m currently running my own business plan in affiliate marketing (see link), but, since money is not streaming in yet, am concerned about the ‘minimize your current job’ bit you rant about in your (audio) book.
In my day-to-day work I work in a team of web developers AND take care of internal and external web servers. A job which, sadly, keeps me in the office 40 hours a week.
My team members highly value direct and immediate response to inquiries, be it domain name changes (DNS), small website changes which have to be done directly and, yes, social contacts.
How CAN I minimize attendance at work, when I am required to be there?
Stats:
- I have a daily commute of about an hour back and forth to work
- Then have an required attendance of about 8.5 hours (including lunch)
- I get paid nearly enough to support my wife and kid (turning 2 in a month)
I tried working from home a few times, but my boss does not want me to make it a habit, due to social interaction woes.
Please advice, thanks!
Hummy — June 9th, 2010, 1:54 pm
You’ve provided some excellent food for thought, I’m especially fond of George Herbert’s quote.
Josh — June 10th, 2010, 2:14 am
Meoow
Hi Tim
your book is a breath of fresh air. Its nice to know their are others out there.
I dropped out of my architecture course and will be turning 22 on july 30th
(lol fun fact i have the same birthday as binladin lol found out a week ago )
i visited Brickwork in Bangalore after reading your book to do first hand research and i just have one thing that i really need to know
if i have absolutely no computer or business background and my computer savvy is probably outdated since i have been living in isolation without tv, family, and on a budget of 5 dollars a day living out of choice to get my priorities in order and gain perspective on my life who I am which I am glad to say I have with 99.999% clarity the what I want changes but the big picture life purpose goals are there.
If i wanted to catch up with the business and computer world at the level of literacy you have and didn’t want to get a degree unless it was completely necessary what would be the most 80/20 path to follow according to your perception looking back
I ask because i will be going back to the U.S. and embarking on my financial adventure i will be throwing myself into NY with 1.1k enough for two months according to a design i experimented with in my last lifestyle design experiment which now i have refined and fine-tuned and in that time i will either have to sink or swim, I have no family support I cut them off 2 years ago. people call me crazy when I told them the 1st time, but i did it for my 20th bday on my own and did exceptional but with the money part this time their is no going back and i just don’t see myself as ever getting a job unless its renting an apartment in Manhattan and using mystery method mechanics along with business marketing DHV’s and all sorts of neat things put into the delivery of the design to meet 10′s and 9s and selectively give them a business card for a introductory meditation class which i offer free and then conveying enough to trigger attraction to the point where she signs up for a course designed by me which encompass my areas of interest meditation/philosophy/massage and have women in rotation who are programmed to get addicted and keep coming back i planned it all out down to the 30% buffer in your book. But i can only do that 4 hours a day 4 days a week max with 100 to 200 dollars an hour ill be fine but with the rest of my time i would really love to explore the business world and have business like the one’s you talk about in your book running while I take a stab at MMA workout, aikido, becoming an exceptional chef and building a truly amazing life , and you know flying around the world extreme sports multiple languages and architecting a structure to teach 365 orphan babies through a philosophy that rivals and combines the greatest wisdom in all fields into a dynamic equilibrium organic architectural system to turn them into geniuses who will hopefully if they please do the same, and then….. I might give some thought to marriage at 60
…… you know all that etc…. stuff… i am lacking confidence sorry to say and i could be a millionare but i dont want millions i just want to live the type of live you have and then some
Obbop — June 10th, 2010, 7:24 am
“Hater,” in the illustrious yet oft-demented mind-set of this Disgruntled Old Coot, is a term used by the ill-educated unwashed masses as a descriptor for anybody who disagrees with their subjective personal opinion.
Often unable to back up their opinion with logical rational thought-out argument the knee-jerk rhetorical proclamation that someone disagreeing with them is a “hater” is an easy inane slovenly method of using emotion to deal with the hater-term-using buffoon’s intellectual superior… of which there is typically a multitude.
Daiyaan Ghani — June 13th, 2010, 11:03 am
“Whenever you hate someone, they own you. They own your thoughts and they own your actions by the mere fact you are thinking of them and reacting.” – something I learnt from Sean Stephenson.
The flip side is that if anyone hates you, learn to feel good about it. The only two reasons I have found that people can hate you for is jealousy and/or they feel threatened – their beliefs/ego feels threatened or they could be threatened by your presence or influence. If it isn’t hatred, its simply they find it annoying (two very different things – we all know a person we find annoying but don’t “hate”)
Learn to love your haters to prevent yourself from being owned.
(that was an awesome talk by the way
Daiyaan
Hannah — June 13th, 2010, 10:20 pm
Hi Tim,
I first came across you about two years ago while searching ways to make money from home. I started following your blog for a short time, sadly, I didn’t keep it up. I did, however, stay tuned into Jango for my musical pleasure. Thanks much for that random show tip.
Anyhow, I want to thank you for sharing your knowledge and experiences about blogging and haters. I am in the midst of putting together my blog style site for the first time, yes, behind the curve of many I know! It has taken me a long time to have a vision and focus for a blog that I am comfortable with. Having a blog is presenting oneself to the world, it is very personal and very public all at the same time! I admire how you have managed to find your balance within all of that.
I also wanted to note that your quickly spoken comment during the presentation about how you do not start your day reading your email because that would be allowing others to dictate how you spend your day, was very enlightening for me. I foolishly do this everyday and then wonder where my day has gone?! So starting tomorrow my morning coffee will not be consumed in front of my computer while grazing my messages. I will take my coffee to the garden, make my list for the day and follow that with a run before I flip my lid – laptop lid that is!
Awesome stuff, Tim. I will be back to absorb more of your wisdom often.
Thank you for being you!
Tim Ferriss — June 19th, 2010, 12:29 am
- Tim
Jason Wheeler — June 14th, 2010, 11:03 am
Tim, I’ve just found your blog and I am reading your book now. I am also in the Bay Area and look forward to attending one of your events sometime. I spent some time learning Muay Thai when I was a bit younger and currently train in Aikido for about the last 7 years. I look forward to learning from you at your blog.
Adam Griffin — June 14th, 2010, 7:58 pm
Tim – I think my case study around this time next year will be the best one to date by far. No lie. Ever since I watched your speech on haters, I couldn’t help but think how the biggest haters in my world right now are those that I know the best. I’m only 25, so they are the people that knew me when I was a drunk 18 year old college kid, or the people I grew up with. It’s like they don’t want to see a grown up version of me, so they attack what I feel are positive things I’m doing. It pushes me further and further from my hometown and the friends I grew up with. Just thought I’d throw that out there. Never thought my biggest detractors would be those I know best. Thanks for everything you do. Much love from Denver ~Adam
Tim Ferriss — June 19th, 2010, 12:23 am
I look forward to your case study this time next year! Just keep positive and keep your eye on the ball. You’ll get there.
Tim
Jo Payne — June 17th, 2010, 12:33 am
Wonderful – I always say surround yourself with positive people and ignore the rest; well at least ignore their comments and keep them out of your personal life.
My current place of employment is full of them, and they’re everywhere out in the big wide world too. Thankfully this has led me to start my own consulting business, which helped me to find Tim’s book.
Thank you
Jason Palmer — June 17th, 2010, 2:33 am
…runs up to tim ferris at party…opens flip phone camera and says
‘so tim, how does it feel being a happy chappy who has written a totally awesome book that encourages people to enjoy life, I mean, er, like, do you wake up with a grin on your face and have a spring in your step ?’
Robin — June 22nd, 2010, 3:26 am
Thanks Tim for that great post. It’s always good to hear. Yesterday I had two people unsubscribe from my newsletter in a slightly rude way. However I have had hundreds of positive feedback about that very same newsletter and two more people signed up that same day. its about realising that some people will be haters but forget about them and keep doing a great job!
Michel — June 23rd, 2010, 2:32 am
I am very impressed, that you answer your comments!
Chapeau, Tim!
boontrade — June 24th, 2010, 7:06 pm
Small passionate communities are now sprouting around the country advocating and suggesting that our fancy Vibram Five Fingers Shoes and our everyday shoes in general are not healthy for us. Whereas many of Vibram shoes claim to help you avoid different foot injuries and offer foot and ankle support to “bring your game to the next level.” These communities suggest that it’s actually these shoes that are the source of all our foot pain and injuries. What do they suggest instead of these shoes? Simply not wearing shoes or in other words just going barefoot.
Looking at our ancestors and how humans developed as a species is one-approach scientists have looked at how shoes have affected our lives (and why going barefoot might be a valid alternative). Dr. Rossi, a prominent podiatrist and foot expert, in a 1999 article in the scientific journal Podiatry Management made the case for going barefoot by writing:
“Five Fingers took 4 million years to develop our unique human foot and our consequent distinctive form of walk, a remarkable feat of bioengineering. Yet, in only a few thousand years, and with one carelessly designed instrument, our shoes, we have warped the pure anatomical form of human walk, obstructing its engineering efficiency, afflicting it with strains and stresses and denying it its natural grace of form and ease of movement head to foot.”
Southpaw13 — June 25th, 2010, 9:04 am
I love your stuff but have never commented…pls work on the delts considering your book will be out soon. Otherwise, looking good….You have changed my life. Be good T
alyse hart — June 28th, 2010, 4:40 pm
whenever you shake up the status quo– they bite–and sometimes they kill you. That’s after they discredit you. Nice work––you expand my mind.
boontrade — June 29th, 2010, 1:08 am
Hello
I want KNOW YOU
boontrade — June 29th, 2010, 1:09 am
Hello
I want to make friends with you
OK?
Willem — July 3rd, 2010, 10:15 am
Hi Tim,
I’m an expert in the field of ‘identity’ and I write articles for magazines and newspapers. Once I wrote an article on regional identity, explaining how it’s rather constructed than something you’re born with. Although this view is generally held by scientists, it seems to keep bugging some people. They were very agitated and went on to say how wrong I was.
Why would they respond so emotionally to a this article? Would they respond the same if I’d written an article on bonsai cultivation? Nah, it all comes down to this:
I challenged their identity.
These agitated readers, many hailing from peripheral areas, are always taught to be proud of their regional identity. “And now this guy comes and tells me that my identity is not real! That’s not what I wanted to hear!”
Tim, most of our respectively haters are very alike. Think about it. Imagine someone who is living the deferred life plan. His parents and society taught him working a boring job for 30-40 years is the right thing to do. And then there’s you, telling the world you don’t have to work hard for a living. Even worse: you prove him wrong by living the life of the New Rich.
No wonder he gets a little anxious… Because: if the deferred life plan turns out to be a lie, then what else is false?
Doc — July 9th, 2010, 8:43 pm
Tim, I’m dismayed that I had never found your blog before today. You’ve definitely got your head screwed on tight! Great blog!
Christine Springer — July 12th, 2010, 3:35 pm
Tim:
This was awesome and SO what I needed to hear today. I write a blog about foreclosure and related legal issues, and recently there seem to be a lot more people showing up as haters while the blog’s reach continues to grow.
My favorites are the people who just want to hate and their comments lack any sort of logical basis for being there other than being angry because I expressed an opinion. I have been feeling the sting from these nasty comments lately and it has been a distraction, but I’m ready to move on after reading/watching this post.
I appreciate the signpost on my journey!
Christine
Coco — July 12th, 2010, 8:58 pm
Hey Tim
Love your perspective and look forward to learning more and more from your approach to life.
Not sure if this kinda thing matters to you but I noticed this other blogger sorta using your content on her site…guess you inspired her.
http://kandeethemakeupartist.blogspot.com/2010/07/7-tips-to-deal-with-haters.html
Anon — July 13th, 2010, 10:20 am
Amazing, I’ve watched this video of your talk about thirty times since it came out. I frequently run into situations which remind me of some part of the talk, and I keep getting new insights and applications from it every time. It has added more value to my life than almost any blog post I can think of anywhere. Words cannot describe my heartfelt gratitude, but thank you. I’m going to be checking your blog for a long time to come.
It’s completely true that one of the major keys to success is in avoiding distractions and getting focused, but I never thought of negative people in that light. Yet, the people we surround ourselves with can be one of if not the greatest influence on our lives, and correspondingly the greatest distraction in the negative case. Yes, the TV and internet etc. can slow us down and dilute our power, but they are passive mediums. They’re distractions, but we probably won’t spend much of the day thinking about them. However, a strong negative person or two in our lives can waste so much of our time and energy. That is why this topic is very very important in unlocking a lot of untapped potential out there.
Steve — July 13th, 2010, 11:09 am
Don’t waste your time apologizing for your principles. The people who care about you won’t need an apology, and the people who don’t care about you won’t believe your apology anyway.
Vince Burns — July 13th, 2010, 2:04 pm
That is a helpful list. I have a bit of a struggle overcoming those issues as well. Kudos for quoting Epictetus.
Interview: Bret Contreras « Doctor Anthony's Insight — July 13th, 2010, 2:36 pm
[...] DEALING WITH HATERS [...]
Matt Caulfield — July 21st, 2010, 2:39 am
Thank you, thank you! I have had my fair share of “haters” in my time and often take it very personally indeed. This post has really helped me deal with those people and my response to them.
Anne — July 25th, 2010, 9:07 am
Hi Tim,
You inspired me with this post at the exact moment I needed to hear it. You’ve hopefully saved me from an emotional reaction to something that is best handled in a more response-able manner.
Many thanks,
Anne
The Product comes before the process — July 26th, 2010, 4:33 pm
[...] Timothy Ferris’ book The 4 Hour Workweek has spawned literally hundreds of offshoot “New Mobile Lifestyle” web sites. Creating a life that requires little work but produces lots of money is not a new concept, yet the book has intensely refocused interest in the concept, particularly in the on-line marketing world. [...]
Peter Farrell — August 3rd, 2010, 10:02 pm
Tim, forget the haters. I’ve been a fan of yours ever since you appeared in all those Colbie Caillat videos. Keep rockin’.
Beth — August 4th, 2010, 7:39 am
Good article, everybody is a hater these days!
Jeff Knize — August 6th, 2010, 8:15 am
Tim,
My business partners and I talk about you all the time — yep, all good. You are doing it right and are an inspiration to millions.
I hate to be hated too but you have a strong belief and a purpose so the 1/1000 of 1% of Ferriss haters may exist but… they are overwhelmed by your raving fans.
Nice work on everything you do!
Jeff
Haters: Learn To Love Them | Matt Shadetek — August 8th, 2010, 2:07 am
[...] just spat at you. Timothy Ferriss, author of The Four Hour Work Week which I reviewed below, wrote a great post about this on his blog. In that, there’s a video, check it out: [...]
Oanaq — August 10th, 2010, 3:54 am
Hi Tim, you are adorable and very inspirational! Hey, why are you not on facebook, or are you??
Tim Ferriss — August 10th, 2010, 3:35 pm
Thx for the comment! Yep, I”m there: http://www.facebook.com/timferriss
Irena — August 11th, 2010, 11:36 am
Few things I have to say to you:
1. First of all, your book (the 4-hour-workweek) inspired me. I had a period of time when I felt stuck: while looking at “career” opportunities it became obvious that more I’ll go up the corporate ladder – less I’ll have the time for myself. It was a-180-degrees career turn: I desided to be an entrepreneur.
2. To look from other point of view: I don’t have haters.
Maybe it’s just my imagination, but it seems that more I proceed with my dreams – the more respect and sympathy I get. Should I start worrying?
3. I think you’re my mom’s soulmate (I’m being weird but I had to take that out of my system)
Jack Ramos — August 11th, 2010, 2:55 pm
i think many people do that because of the self-defense of them from what i called live pressure. it would be come from the environment, something or someone around them. and they looking for an “escaping” from the trouble that they seem. keep posting and rock!!
Ashwin — August 13th, 2010, 10:24 am
Loved the part “to only be ashamed of those things that are truly worth being ashamed of” struck a chord…
Nikolai The Good News — August 15th, 2010, 12:09 am
Great discussion guys!
My take on the topic is :
Fear of criticism or disapproval is the #1 cause why people don’t progress.
Nathan Greenlee — August 18th, 2010, 2:47 pm
Good stuff Tim. “Tim Ferriss Scam!” is also a clever Judo redirect on the haters trying to get Google juice on those keywords. Instead of finding a hater site they will be steered to your site!
BTW — I was a skeptic up until yesterday when I finally started reading “The Four Hour Work Week”. I had learned quite a few of the lessons that you teach on my own / the hard way. However, what truly won me over was Pareto’s Law. I knew about it, but hadn’t thought of how it applies to my life, very insightful. One day later I’m already seeing things through a different lens. I did not check my email first thing this am — a big deal for me!
Thanks,
Nathan
Sorin — August 20th, 2010, 3:25 am
Hi Tim,
You inspired me with this post at the exact moment I needed to hear it. You’ve hopefully saved me from an emotional reaction to something that is best handled in a more response-able manner.
James — September 14th, 2010, 8:52 pm
I really liked this article, thank you for writing it. I am just getting into the blogging scene but I can see that this also can relate outside of the internet. Thanks again for writing this,
James
Brian — September 27th, 2010, 5:47 am
OK. All well and good but based on reading your book I have a few concerns.
1. The system you advocate relies heavily upon the exploitation of social inequities – mainly those existing between India and the U.S. I was struck by the Esquire ‘editor at large’ making the observation that “America is f*cked” but seeming to find no real problem with this. Instead of using his medium to highlight the damage outsourcing is doing to America, he enthusiastically embraces it. This allows him – presumably – to flutter about the world taking tango lessons or scouring the globe for the ultimate Borsch.
It seems a certain degree of willful ignorance and / or disregard for the consequences of ones actions must be maintained to make your system work.
2. What happens when India eventually approaches wage parity with the U.S.? Your so-called NR must either a) pray this does not happen or b) if it does, start casting about looking for another suitably down-trodden third world country to exploit….er, I mean “relocate operations” to.
Sandra — October 10th, 2010, 9:13 am
In my opinion, fear of criticism or prejudice is the main cause why people don’t progress in their lives.
Regards,
Sandra
jaime cevallos — October 11th, 2010, 12:06 pm
It sure seems to be that way, Sandra. But at the same time, I feel like people who fear those things also serve a “larger purpose.” They are meant to do the mundane tasks that the masses have to do. They don’t question, they just accept. Those who chose to be motivated by or all out ignore criticism tend to have a unique purpose – to invent, discover, teach, inspire. I see it as two different roles being played.
Diseno — October 18th, 2010, 6:23 am
You have made me think seriously about this issue. I’ve done a print to read with a coffee. Thanks for this post.
Lyn Leon
Rafa — October 24th, 2010, 8:24 am
There is nothing worse than jealousy, so people are very annoying and I pass their negativity
( sorry for my english )
Justin Cordingley — October 25th, 2010, 12:37 am
Heh, been using my ‘business name’ (Well, more like internet handle) so long, I feel naked without it…
Anyway, I just wanted to say that I thought this was going to be a winner the moment I came across the title, and the material certainly didn’t disappoint!
Thanks Nathan Greenlee, that redirect comment is a very nice obversation!
Brian, in response to “2. What happens when India eventually approaches wage parity with the U.S.? Your so-called NR must either a) pray this does not happen or b) if it does, start casting about looking for another suitably down-trodden third world country to exploit….er, I mean “relocate operations” to.”
… I think that’s just a sign of the changing times. As the world becomes more connected, each country will slowly grow more towards parity in economy and lifestyle. So yes, eventually India will probably start to come on par for wages. The “so called NR” exist because of change, not because of stagnation.
Welcome to the digital age, my friend.
Ben — November 27th, 2010, 8:56 pm
Just re-reading this. A corollary to number six:
“The best revenge is not to be like that.”
- Marcus Aurelius’s Meditations, Book 6, Meditation 6
Aumentar Visitas — December 5th, 2010, 9:48 pm
Loved the part “to only be ashamed of those things that are truly worth being ashamed of” struck a chord…
Jim Schaum — December 15th, 2010, 10:35 am
At the time I am writing this (12/15/2010) this post has been around for a while. I happened to stumble across it and felt that I had to weigh in. As someone who has been in a bad situation this year, financially, physically, and emotionally, I have had a lot of time to reflect and to try and learn some new things. Some of the conclusions that I have come to are:
1) We are each responsible, to some degree, for the situations that we are in.
2) We all could be doing more to make things in our lives better.
3) If things are going to get better, it will only be through our own efforts.
As someone who has not lived up to my potential, I am going to make a concerted effort to change that starting today.
I met Timothy Ferriss last night at the launch party for his new book “The 4 Hour Body”. I only talked to him for a few minutes, but I can tell you he is the real deal. The guy is down to earth and completely laid back. He is an ideal that we should all aspire to. Keep up the good work Tim.
Sorin — December 19th, 2010, 9:39 am
Sorry about above, that quote was off. (and it’s from Dr. Seuss): Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind. Next time I’ll check before sending
Karl — December 22nd, 2010, 12:12 pm
In dealing with haters, surely we have to recognise that our most useful feedback can come from a few of our harshest critics- those we easily dismiss as haters. This is because the hashness of the criticism that we *feel* could be due to their feedback painfully conflicting with our own cherished beliefs.
Maybe the other guy is right.
But the above only applies to a few sensible critics. Many haters are irrationally so.
And anyone who suffers from such haters should gain solace in recognising that a hater has not only failed to learn anything instructive from their object of hate, but are busy starting a life-crippling habit of negativity and venom.
Considering this, a victim of hatred can have sympathy for the hater!
People tend to dislike the source of their feeling of inferiority or envy.
So perhaps there’s a paradox: the more fame one has in educating others in how to succeed without too much effort (e.g. 4HWW), the more followers and detractors they’ll accumulate. With the detractors suffering from envy or feelings of inferiority in not achieving such succcess without much effort.
But it’s the “without much effort” aspect that gains the followers- a Catch 22.
Anyway, lets have pity for the haters in our [relatively successful] lives.
Todd I. Stark — December 28th, 2010, 6:57 am
Karl makes a great point above. Enemies and non-participants are a major distraction, but friends who disagree are your most important source of learning I think.. To me the critical skills for the purpose of learning and improving (vs. just effective marketing) involve listening to people genuinely so that you don’t alienate critics, but then recognizing when someone is refusing to listen to you.
The redirection tactics apply beautifully when you no longer have a reasonable disagreement but a pissing contest or just lost cause. Plenty of those. My own concern is that many people I come across, assuming they have some sort of great product or brilliant idea, often get full of themselves and turn every response to critics into a display of supposed cleverness rather than an opportunity to learn. To me those folks come to legitimately earn much of the criticism as they start to listen only to their minions and develop a mini-”cult” mentality.
I really admire the people I’ve met who have learned to listen to the inevitable critics and respond constructively to them and sometimes even learn from them. That impresses me more than having a slick idea or product because it shows intelligence rather than just marketing cleverness. I do appreciate the clever redirections though when someone becomes a pointless distraction and refuses to be reasonable.
Tim Ferriss — December 28th, 2010, 6:10 pm
Hi Todd,
Thanks for the comment. I couldn’t agree more. Critics are a huge source of education, but it’s important to separate the useful (and insightful) from the armchair quarterbacks who are career skeptics. The latter often miss the forest for the trees.
Again, totally agree on your points.
All the best,
Tim
Jose — January 6th, 2011, 7:13 am
Excellent!
It’s unfortunate that we have to put up with the haters in the first place.
Hernandez Vilches — January 9th, 2011, 11:52 am
What is the best tattoo of everyone you know?
Ty Wagner — January 9th, 2011, 5:14 pm
This is a great video Tim and I’m glad that you made this video. We all get detracted by the haters sometimes. We get rapped up into what they think and how they feel and sometimes question why they feel that way. The list you just gave will go on my white board for a while, untill it’s installed in my head for the long term. Especially for entrepreneurs. WE seem to attract a lot of haters because we seem to think on a differen’t creative plane than most “worker drones”. No offense to you 9-5er’s. I know it’s late but great post man…
Keep on and carry-on Tim!
Chris — January 11th, 2011, 8:49 pm
I found a scam tonight with Ryan Blair’s new company. I threw up the whole scoop including the original Craigslist ad, their email correspondence, and a video they sent me. They promised $100,000 paid to those selected but wanted $499 paid to them. http://obsessedwithchris.blogspot.com/2011/01/scam-alert-ryan-blair-ceo-course.html
Suz deMello — January 15th, 2011, 8:02 pm
Glad the tats were fake–they really were appalling!
lemon — January 19th, 2011, 4:00 pm
Hi Tim,
Today I met your blog and a bit of your life. This article I write, these 10 ideas that you are very good, especially the number 6 is something I have always defended and I agree 100% on what you comment. And as we say in my country (Spain) “the best appreciation is not to scorn,” I guess this topic already know.
Today I learned something else in life.
Thanks and regards
Lemon — January 19th, 2011, 4:30 pm
Hi Tim,
Very good thoughts, the truth is helpful and sobering. We live in a world full of jealousy and hypocrisy. No longer valued the good things people simplicity, humildaz, respect … but be prepared for today’s society.
Cheers, Lemon
David-E Cohen — February 2nd, 2011, 12:52 pm
Thanks Tim,
really great speech. I love the advices and points of view.
Especially the “live well”.
So, live well! And take care,
David
Sergey - Project management — February 15th, 2011, 4:12 pm
great post, can be applied to all areas of life. I loved the point six: ” Living well is the best revenge. “(George Herbert). Magnificent.
Cris — February 19th, 2011, 3:22 pm
Fantastic as always Tim. I love your attitude before you life as you manage the challenges and help others understand your message.
Lance Mccarty — February 20th, 2011, 4:04 pm
Hey Tim,
Clever use of responding to Google searches, as this is what led me here! When I started to type in your name, the ‘instant search’ function popped up the word SCAM next to your name (and my curiosity was aroused).
My take away is that negative comments can either be starved of oxygen (by no response) or used in a positive manner – which is what you did here. Wish I could think of a negative comment to get a response to this post
, but I can only think of positive things to say….
Simple torsion — March 5th, 2011, 7:25 am
Yes, very interesting way to see the life you have, Tim.
thanks.
Lily — February 21st, 2011, 2:18 am
I like the way you deal with life..
Leigh — March 1st, 2011, 7:48 pm
# 5 Speaks to me the most and is the hardest to overcome. I think I get lumped into “that silly woman” category often enough. It bothers me more than it should — gotta fix that.
Hats off to Tim and Cato for the tip!
Plantas Electricas — March 12th, 2011, 6:27 am
Maybe you can use that image in your favor.
Charlie — March 5th, 2011, 5:56 pm
So helpful! Thank you Tim!
Erick — March 9th, 2011, 6:24 pm
I think that haters , themselves, are mediocre. if you think something sucks, and you take the time to talk trash about it, why not trying to do something better?. Why not lear from someone elses experience. This are selfish people who dont accept that someone eles can do things better than them.
Nikolai The Good News — March 9th, 2011, 6:44 pm
Great point – I agree- spend your time on something more productive than criticizing.
Comer Para Perder — March 18th, 2011, 11:58 pm
Hi Tim,
Killer blog post. I am going to implement the Comment Rules right away.
Especially on our high traffic blogs and will definitely be putting in a (Thanks to Tim Ferris for the inspiration at the end and add a link back to this page). And no I won’t copy yours 
Great stuff.
Efren - Anuncios — March 26th, 2011, 4:30 pm
I have to give you some serious credit for motivating me in some very positive ways. Thanks to your inspiration, I have created a pretty decent website and will be embarking on a trip around the world in 2011.
Maxim — March 31st, 2011, 4:52 am
Putting “scam” in the title is just an awesome move! SEO in action!
Todd I. Stark — March 31st, 2011, 1:36 pm
I wonder if it is possible that that the conjunction of two remarkable and rare events takes place: (1) that an author isn’t perfect and cares enough about their content to improve, and (2) that someone actually has a constructive criticism. I think I’ve seen it from time to time but fleetingly and then it vanishes. Telling that both authors and critics seem to share this perception of rarity in my experience.
And virtually unknown is the critic or author who changes their mind as a result of being persuaded by constructive and accurate criticism.
To me personally that’s a more interesting state of affairs to address than the relatively easy one (in comparison) of dealing with people who seem to have nothing constructive to say and aren’t just delightfully fawning.
Todd I. Stark — April 1st, 2011, 7:45 am
I have to admit, the title is brilliant. I was able to find this article again instantly just by searching on Tim Ferriss scam. Leo Babauta had some useful things to say about handling criticism that I liked also: http://zenhabits.net/criticism/
Juan - Vender Desde Casa — April 3rd, 2011, 5:34 am
I finally watched the video – I see what tattoo in mention.
Thanks, Tim. This is excellent advice and is about to be posted on my office wall…
lopez- bajar de peso saludablemente — April 5th, 2011, 12:33 am
Jealousy is very bad. There will always be enemies. Just be yourself.
Billie — April 17th, 2011, 6:50 am
I stumbled across this video because I was looking for a source to help me deal with a boss who distorts reality continually, the best friend of the President of the company (so no help there) and is vicious and nasty. Ass-kissing and doing back-flips for her doesn’t work. I have to put up with it until I find another job. I don’t want to interact negatively with her. I have been using these tactics but they are very wearing; especially since she is making up lies about me to the president. I am a very positive person and always setting goals (and attaining them!). I am working in a job that doesn’t pay well but I love the mission of the work. I have all I really need but don’t need to work for a hater. I know she’s miserable and therefore wants everyone else to be miserable. I just need to ignore her and pretend her antics are invisible. Thanks for the support.
Me — April 18th, 2011, 2:00 am
You’re a victim. A nonintegrous victim. It’s not actually possible for you to comprehend the profound significance of this, but it is a very serious condition that you suffer from.
Billie — April 20th, 2011, 11:57 pm
and the condition would be….
vuelos ultima hora — April 26th, 2011, 7:42 am
Stay calm and everything will fall under its own weight, trust in you be yourself.
Billie — April 26th, 2011, 4:22 pm
thanks…will keep my head down and my spirits up!!!!
Patrick — May 9th, 2011, 6:17 pm
Awesome information! Living well is the best revenge and amps productivity. Haters fade and fizzle while our goal is to rock an sizzle! Life is short and I have found it is best to stay happy, head up, smile and be proud. 100% total bad a**, concise message here my friend.
Roy — May 19th, 2011, 7:19 pm
Absolutely right in saying: If a vessel contains acid and you Pour Some on an object, it’s still the vessel That sustains The Most Damage
Annia Keosavang — May 30th, 2011, 11:02 pm
Great post, thanks for sharing such informative insights on how to deal with criticism.
Keep it up!
Cheers,
A
Johann Abogados — May 31st, 2011, 3:56 pm
This is a great advice, thank you very much. Nice information. Keep it up!
Cheers.
Johann
Martin Fernandez | Masajeador — June 2nd, 2011, 3:07 pm
Very interesting and inspiring article indeed. I will let my Bloggers read this so is proabable I am going to mention this in my blog tim. Thanks. Article writers may learn how to express better, so this is usefull for my blog as an example.
Regards,
Martin
Lucio Boda — June 24th, 2011, 9:07 pm
Great information. It was very insightful.
Keep it up
Billie — July 5th, 2011, 7:09 pm
And now…I’m fired…they said, “You didn’t like your job.”…I’m like, “Hey, why didn’t you talk to me about that?”
So wrong. The Scarlett O’Hara of the project shot me down.and got her way…
Onward and upward and no more thieves taking my humanity away………
Seumas Graham — June 25th, 2011, 3:26 am
Great advice. My philosophy has always been to feel sorry for anyone who “pours acid” on others. Wish them well, since they are clearly being stupid. Also, avoid those who give you bad vibes. Life is too short.
Climatizacion — July 4th, 2011, 9:44 pm
Excellent advice, Tim. I just stumbled upon this article and I must say I really enjoy your advices and way of living.
claudia — July 28th, 2011, 6:24 pm
good information, One of my favorite quotes is from the Dalai Lama: “Our enemies provide us with a precious opportunity to practice patience and love
Hacer un blog — August 17th, 2011, 12:29 am
Hey Tim! Ich wusste gar nicht das du Deutsch sprichst!
I saw in your bio that you are a “Speaker of 5 languages”. Impressive.
Ximena | optimizepress español — August 24th, 2011, 12:34 am
I read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s Pulling Your Own Strings about being “quietly effective”.
Don’t wrestle with negativity from the masses, but always think for yourself and act rebelliously if necessary. Wise words…
Thanks for sharing
Ximena.
Vinicio - Trabajo en Casa — August 25th, 2011, 6:07 pm
The fake tattoo thing was funny, I didn’t think you had any tattoos after all those episodes of Random but you did take a long trip to China!
Alejandro Invertir en bolsa — August 30th, 2011, 3:03 pm
Anyone will always find enemies for free, and if the word enemy is exaggerated, at least we will find that envious people don’t wish us well things and will try to make our life impossible. It can happen at work or anywhere. But as Dale Carnegie said: “Nobody kicks a dead dog.” That is, if they are jealous is because we’re doing something good.
Lia Kalezic — September 7th, 2011, 4:07 am
Hi Tim,
Please explain to me how it is that my husband (whom is in business with me)after having read your book is now so judgemental of everything that we have acheived over the past 3 years in business (he previously did furniture removal for a job, whilst I have spent 27 yrs in our industry at GM level) and he is now working a 24/7 work week to acheive and yet you are his Guru? I have read many books similar to yours in the past 27 years and outsourcing ain’t new. We are an online business and my husband refuses the idea of automating replies, so how is it that we can end up in arguments continually where you are apparently the ‘Be all & End all’ and I am now just a piece of outdated crap because I don’t subscibe to your tactics. By the way my company was drop shipping from local suppliers direct to customers 15yrs ago! Now My husband thinks we can have our Chines suppliers drop ship item bu item to anywhere in the world….I’ve got new for both of you….this ain’t going happenm and if you dealt with the people producing the products, as I do, you’d get your heads out of your arses and realise China ain’t interested in doing business on a ‘one order/one customer’basis!! They currently have no need to not in the foreseeable future will they!. There are so many things in your book that inspire the ‘average’ man and yet there is so much, in the way of reality, that you don’t cover. Inspiration is great, but unless you provide the vunerable with ‘day to day ‘ tools, your inspiration is actually their demise.
Gabriela | postres faciles y rapidos — October 5th, 2011, 6:22 am
Buenos días:
Antes que nada disculpen que estoy escribiendo en español en un blog que es en inglés. Lo que sucede es que no escribo bien en inglés y me parece una falta de respeto escribir con faltas ortográficas.
De todas maneras, quería decirles que me encantó el video y además excelente post.
Muchas gracias por el aporte
Monty — October 23rd, 2011, 10:13 am
I agree with Chris Mower: it seems like a lot more than 10% find ways to take anything personally. Living well is indeed the best revenge; although it probably leads to more negativity on the part of the haters.
Lisa Gergets — October 29th, 2011, 8:36 am
My followers do so because of who I am – human, approachable, transparent. The people who don’t follow me because of who I am are simply dead weight. Who needs ‘em? Onward and upward!
Trigliceridos Altos — November 23rd, 2011, 1:10 am
Very cool! Will have to share this info to a few others!
Vale - Trigliceridos Altos — November 28th, 2011, 11:46 am
Great advice. My philosophy has always been to feel sorry for anyone who “pours acid” on others. Wish them well, since they are clearly being stupid. Also, avoid those who give you bad vibes. Life is too short.
Christian Comunidad Beta — December 14th, 2011, 2:58 pm
Fuck you Tim Ferriss! You’re a sham and a scam and a sham and a scam and a sham and a scam!
I’m going to keep my uptight, 8 hour day, miserable lifestyle and finally retire at age 70 and you can screw your four hour work week because I lack the brain cells to understand half of it (*sob*).
Sincerely, a hater
alondra — December 29th, 2011, 4:00 pm
would be nice to deal with the enemies but I find it is very expensive !!!!!!!! greetings!!
Dani | Fontaneria en Castellon — January 16th, 2012, 6:20 am
Excellent advice, Tim. I just stumbled upon this article and I must say I really enjoy your advices and way of living.
Shawn Lyons — February 1st, 2012, 12:33 pm
I’ve limited my hater mail readings to once a month and im working on outsourcing
all readings to my agent soon. Ha.
Tim shady — February 7th, 2012, 6:45 pm
Great post. As am SEO guy, I get a lot of “reputation management” requests. The best way to defend yourself online is to outrank people for (insert your brand here) “scam, complaints, rip-off). Clearly Tim is on this one as he’s got his title tags working for him.
Good stuff as always Tim.
Daniel posicionamiento — February 8th, 2012, 11:57 pm
well, haters are gonna hate, what are you gonna do? the best advices ever about that topic here in this great article: “Living well is the best revenge.”
Alex - distanciometro — April 12th, 2012, 1:23 pm
So true! Luckily I don’t have too many haters, but there are definitely a few who struggle to understand the Ultimate Lifestyle philosophy of living and continuously try to reinforce the current status quo. Bless them!
Matt Dye — April 13th, 2012, 8:37 am
Great post Tim, very clear and concise. I totally agree with you that it is best to focus on the impact of your core group, and I like the Roman history my friend, great stuff!
Cody — May 4th, 2012, 10:30 am
You experience things and teach us your process through those experiences and for that I thank you. You have taught me to work to become an expert at my passion and the more I learn, the more I try and pass to others. Keep it up TF, keep it up!
Jeremy Grenemyer — May 22nd, 2012, 3:41 pm
Tim thanks for sharing this video. There were plenty of takeaways in it that I identified as useful to me. In particular how (and when) to respond to negative comments online.
Your approach to establishing rules for comments posted to your blog and your strategy to stamp out negativity are like a breath of fresh air.
I wish more websites followed a policy that emphasized keeping things friendly instead of allowing everyone to have their say and then moderating after the fact. The former is much more likely to establish community than the later.
emailing — May 26th, 2012, 4:08 am
Excellent article and the information is easy to understand, thanks a lot this kind of blog
Trevor — June 21st, 2012, 9:17 am
Hater is not a word.
Gerry Dorrian — August 12th, 2012, 3:19 am
Brilliant tips – I will start putting these into action. Thank you!
Mauri - Dietas efectivas — November 4th, 2012, 2:56 pm
I liked point 4, I think that’s where I have more work to do now.
Great post
Wawan Kurniawan — November 12th, 2012, 11:42 pm
Extremely good views, the real truth is beneficial and sobering. Tim thanks for sharing this video. There had been plenty of takeaways in it that I identified as helpful to me.
Chistes — December 1st, 2012, 7:26 am
I totally agree with Monty, life is to enjoy it and put aside the problems.
Abel — March 8th, 2013, 1:27 pm
It shows that you follow your own advice!
Congratulations on your success. I admire you, dude.
Best regards!
Simancas — March 11th, 2013, 12:41 am
Hi, Tim!
I never imagined how love haters. Pont 6 is the best for me because haters only want to provoke, most of the times.
“Don’t worry, be happy!”
Thanks in advance!
Iain Taylor — April 8th, 2013, 3:08 pm
Hey Tim,
This post has inspired me more than ever.
I have followed many of the lessons from your books especially “4 Hour Body” – it transformed my fitness and has made it sustainable, as in my fitness routine has become a solid part of my life.
Having read the points above I am ready to “go public” – as all-to-often I have feared “haters” so much that I choose not to proceed. Looking forward to sharing my progress with you soon.
Thanks
Iain
Alex Kei — April 17th, 2013, 2:02 pm
right now I am dealing with a situation similar to this. In my case with the phrase “Alex Kei estafador” (the spanish phrase for “Alex Kei Scammer”)
It is disappointing that some people try to use your name to say bad things you never did. But I guess that’s part of the human nature.
Cheers!
Alex.
Jugo Verde — April 26th, 2013, 7:53 pm
I’ll never understand why some people are concerned with criticizing the success of others and do nothing, absolutely nothing to get yours. Dogs in the Manger: “I eat or stop eating”.
Some time ago, I read in a book: “The obstacles appear, when you take the view of the target” =) Good day.
Robert v. — May 2nd, 2013, 9:42 pm
Love your haters, they’re you’re biggest fans. -Akon
LH — May 6th, 2013, 8:25 pm
very helpful information. OK, 1000 fans. that makes sense. thanks for your advice. great video.
Geoff — May 27th, 2013, 3:02 pm
Really significant statements that apply to more than just media haters.
To be fair, the most significant part of that whole post, for me, was only 2 words. But those 2 words really stood out at this time in my life….LIVING WELL.
It’s probably going to be seen as stupid by many people, and even more will laugh at me for say it, but I really needed to hear those words today.
Thank you for all the help Tim.
Keep everything going. You’re awesome.